Tag: takatsuki sen

from @sweetgm2

Continuation of Takatsuki Sen’s Black Goats egg from your original answer to my request? I loved it so much!

Thank you ❤

“Look,” says his fiancee. Mitsu. Her name is Mitsu, because she’s his bright light. “I know you think you’re going to infect me and kill everyone.”

“Mother won’t let me go,” he mutters.

“But that man you just killed was trying to kill me,” says Mitsu. “There’s a difference between killing for pleasure, like your Mom, or killing to defend someone else.”

“It’s still killing,” he mutters. And the worst part is, he worries the man was right. The man who swung at Mitsu, saying he couldn’t let her forgive the family of the Black Goat, couldn’t let them move on like nothing had happened.

And now he’s just like Mother. A killer. 

“You’re overly worried about violence, and with good reason,” says Mitsu. “But you’re not violent unless you have to be. You are not your Mother.” 

Maybe she’s right. Maybe his perspective is distorted, because he sees everything as more violent than it is. He can’t even leash a dog without crying.

The police let him go. But he’s haunted by the violence.

“They say you picture blood on your hands when you kill someone. I never have,” he tells Mitsu. “I picture blood in my heart.”

If she’s disturbed, she doesn’t let on. She kisses him instead.

Escape her Room.

He takes Mitsu by her hands. Is she right? Is he so scared of becoming violent, his inaction results in violence? 

If he hadn’t killed, Mitsu would be dead. He loves Mitsu. He needs her alive. 

“I want to value all life,” he confesses. “But right then, I valued yours above his.”

“That’s not inherently wrong,” Mitsu suggests. 

Maybe. He’s not sure. 

But she makes him feel happy, and that’s a feeling he’s never known before, even if his happiness shouldn’t be more valuable than another’s. 

It’s that night that he decides to escape, to take Mitsu to a fancy hotel and consummate their relationship like she’s wanted for a long time.

As she kisses the sweating skin over his heart, her eyes sparkle. “I see nothing but normal blood here.” 

He dares to hope that is true.

A scene that could’ve been from Takatsuki Sen’s novel Black Goats Egg based on the snippets we have of it from the manga/calendar?

I like this prompt! Thanks for asking it. TW for abuse/serial killing/disturbing content. 

“In this room, you must not love anyone.” Mother grips The Boy’s chin. “Even me.”

She shoves him in, and he’s not ready, and he’s panicking, because there’s a man with half his intestines falling out, and he feels so bad for the man. He wants to help him, but saving him would mean killing Mother.

“If I die in here, you want me to die. You want whatever happens in this room.” 

I don’t really, he thinks. 

But is he still in that room? Is he still seven years old? Is he still weeping as he promises himself he will never be like her?

Or is he twenty-five years old, weeping because he has done something like her after all, because violence is in his DNA? Because all his life he’s been trapped in that room? 

“You can be free,” says the woman before him.

She’s not Mother.

She’s his fiancee.

He loves her.

I don’t even know what love is.

“Is love killing myself?” he whispers. If he reproduces with this woman, he could carry on Mother’s legacy. Goat after goat. 

“I don’t want you dead,” she whispers.

“But I do.” If he stays alive, he’ll be alive for Mother. Because for some reason, she never killed him.

Why? He wants to run to her, rotting in her prison cell, and demand. You never killed my body, but you’ve killed everything that ever mattered to me. You killed my peace. Why didn’t you go easy on me?

“We never go easy on them,” she said, and he’s once more in the room. “Killing is the easy part, Boy.”

“Life is the scary part,” he echoes. Would he care as much about the man before him if he were a corpse? Undoubtedly no.

To choose life or death, that is the question. 

“What if it’s not? What if ‘what kind of life’ is the question and death isn’t a factor yet?” A voice presses in, and he wonders if it’s true, if maybe he can escape the room.