Naki is too pure for this world

Naki reaches out a hand to stroke Miza, to assure her he’s okay.

His hand slips through her.

“What?!” he shrieks.

“You’re a spirit now, Naki.” Shio and Rikai appear. “We have to go now.”

“Go where?” Naki sounds frightened.

“Heaven.”

“For me?” Naki swallows. Miza is crying. How can he leave her?

“Yes.” Shio throws his arms around Naki. “We’ll be right beside you.”

“Are you – dead?” Naki is horrified. “Not you!”

“It’s okay. Yusa and Hirako are strong. Miza is strong. They’ll remember us, lie you remember your bro.” Rikai nods as tears stream down Shio and Naki’s faces.

“I’ll look after both of you until you see your Arima again,” Naki promises them. As the world around them begins to fade, he grips the children tight.

Tokyo Ghoul girls as commercials

Kirishima Touka – Come to Re coffeeshop! Have yourself the best coffee, and then…

Kosaka Yoriko – Make your way next door for the best baked goods you’ll ever taste.

Kamishiro Rize – star of a new show, “Ghoul vs. Food.”

Fueguchi Hinami – Child sponsorship.

Irimi Kaya – Doberman adoption.

Nishino Kimi – she’s in two. An advertisement for the human-ghoul alliance, and an ad for Nishikimiazole, the treatment she developed for ghouls to eat normally.

Itori – Come to the hottest bar around. Serving both humans and ghouls! Sometimes humans to ghouls (just kidding).

Hoito Roma – Olay revitalizing cream.

Yonebayashi Saiko – Comic-Con!!!

Hsaio Ching-Li – Martial arts center.

Yoshimura Eto – Ad for the news program she hosts, Ghouls Unmasked! with Eto Yoshimura.

Kusakari Miza – Knife shop.

Mado Akira – How to increase your workplace efficiency, even with a cat, PSA.

Aura Kiyoko – Woman in the workplace PSA.

Kanae Von Rosewald – Romantic drama.

Yasuhisa Kurona – Anti-psychotic medication. She tells her story of hearing her sister’s voice from her stomach. It’s all very moving.

Yumitsu Tomoe – Kick-ass action movie.

Nico – Sephora.

Ihei Hairu – The best melon buns around!

Souza Rikai – Back to school.

Shio introduces Masanori to memes.

“Masanori!” Ihei Shio waves his nephew over.

“Is today the day?” The kid quivers with excitement.

“It is,” Rikai intones.

“Masanori, today you begin your training.” Yusa hands a phone to Shio.

“Gaze upon it,” sings Shio, holding the pink-coated device out to Masanori.

Masanori frantically types into the phone. Finally he holds up a image.

“Not bad, not bad,” Shio says merrily. “But watch this!”

“This is Uncle Fruit,” Yusa adds.

Some time later, Uncle Hajime strolls in alongside Ui and Hairu.

“LOOK I MADE YOU INTO A MEME!”

Masanori races over to shove his meme in Hajime’s face.

Hajime subconsciously pats his cute face. “At least I’m cuter than that thing.”

“Shio, you didn’t.” Ui is not prepared for this day.

Hairu is ready.

“Hairu, no!” Ui cries. She winks in response.

Masanori grins. “I made us into a meme, too!”

Ui is almost too terrified to look, but when he does, he’s surprised at the tears that prick his eyes.

Part 3 of the dreams) Hajime and the Squad zero kids have the same dreams as the others, only back to back. This prompts them to bond further with Kaneki, for Hajime to think things through and for Kaneki to gain four new members to his family.

“No, stop, Arima! Arima!” wails Shio.

“Shio, Shio, Shio!” Hirako shakes the child awake. “What happened?”

“Arima – was holding me down – and driving IXA through my eye.” Shio sobs.

“You’re okay. We’ve got you. And Arima loved you.” Yusa hugs his friend, and Rikai nods solemnly.

They drift back to sleep, but this time it’s Yusa sobbing awake. “Mom, stop – I won’t do it again, I promise!”

“Yusa?” Rikai tiptoes closer. “Yusa, you don’t know your mother.”

“Well, I did, and she was hitting me.” Yusa wipes his eyes.

Shio slips under the covers with him. “Here, let’s snuggle. Rikai, join us.”

“I’m fine.” Rikai smiles uncertainly before falling asleep.

“My TOES!” Rikai bolts upright with a shriek. “I was – in a chair – and Jason was chopping off my toes. They kept regrowing, and he kept cutting them off!”

Shio drags her into bed with he and Yusa. “I wonder why we’re all having nightmares.”

“Have you looked at our life?” Yusa asks.

They’re awakened not twenty minutes later by a scream from the cell a few blocks down.

“CENTIPEDES IN MY EARS!”

Hirako, Yusa, Shio, and Rikai bolt for Hajime’s cell. The child is flailing about, frothing at the mouth. He lets out bloodcurdling scream after bloodcurdling scream.

“Hajime!” Shio launches himself into the cell before Hirako can stop him.

“AHHHHHHHHH!”

“Wake up!” Rikai spits into Hajime’s face.

“Pah!” The brat awakens. Sweat beads adorn his forehead. “Huh?”

“Please tell me that’s not how you woke me up,” Yusa says. She smirks in response.

“Did you have the dreams? The torture dreams?” Shio asks.

“I was Kaneki Ken, and Jason putting – centipedes in my ears.” Hajime shakes. He fucking hates bugs.

“I was Kaneki in my nightmare, too,” says Yusa.

“Jason kept cutting off my toes,” says Rikai quietly. “Was the room in a mall, with a vaulted ceiling?”

Hajime nods.

“Did you smell flowers when you dreamt, Shio?” asks Yusa.

“Yeah.” Shio turns to Hirako. “What’s happening to us?”

“You’re having the Kaneki dream, monsieur!” Tsukiyama Shuu waltzes in before Hirako can answer. “We’ve all experienced it at one point or another.”

“Did those – did that really happen to him?” Shio touches his eye unconsciously.

“Indeed,” Tsukiyama says grimly.

Shio begins to cry. “Why? Why would Arima do that?”

“Why would anyone put bugs in someone’s ears?” howls Hajime.

“Where is Kaneki?” Yusa demands.

The king peers around the corner, flanked by Touka and Ayato and – Mutsuki?

“Thought you were at CCG!” Hajime shrieks.

“Thought you said you wouldn’t get caught,” Mutsuki cries back.

“Kingggggggggggg.” Shio flies into Kaneki’s arms, and Yusa and Rikai follow.

Kaneki gingerly pats their heads.

“Don’t be embarrassed. It wasn’t your fault,” says Yusa.

Mutsuki notices Hajime watching them enviously. He inches into the cell and loosens the chains just enough to pull Hajime into the love circle.

Hirako frowns, but accepts the kid.

“I’m sorry that happened. Why do you still like ghouls?” Hajime demands.

Kaneki touches Hajime’s chin. “That’s a long story.”

“I’ve got no where else to be, considering my captain is apparently here now.”

I’ve seen very little Hairu/Sasaki fanfiction. Could you maybe?

“Ihei.” Sasaki Haise nods at her. “That was a brilliant move out there.”

“Oh really?” Ihei Hairu smiles at him. She’s so pretty, his stomach hurts. “Want me to teach you?”

Sasaki nods eagerly, and Hairu rubs her hands together with anticipation.

She’s always felt comfortable around Sasaki, because he is a ghoul. He can’t judge her for the garden. She feels certain that if he knew her secret, he would accept her.

“Teach us, too!” Shio hurries over.

Sasaki’s face falls, and Hairu blushes.

“Uh – Shio…” Yusa says nervously.

“No, no, of course I’ll teach you.” Hairu ruffles Rikai’s hair. She can be another Arima to these kids – teach them, give them hope.

Ui watches but doesn’t join in. He wears a pout on his delicate face.

When Sasaki grabs her hands, Hairu catches her breath. From the red tinge to Sasaki’s cheeks, he feels it too.

Would Arima approve? She thinks so.

“Uh – would you like to get dinner after this?” she asks quickly.

Sasaki nods, and she throws him backwards. “I win this round. You have to be quicker on your feet.”

He smiles back at her.

Furuta is captured by Goat. Angst.

“Eat up, little baby!” Furuta remembers spreading his arms wide as death soared for him.

So how is he waking up – not in nothingness or hell, but in a cell?

“Bonjour, Souta. Remember me?”

Furuta sits straight up. Oh, his circulation to his arms and legs has been cut off by chains that bind him to a wall.

Tsukiyama Shuu lounges across the cell.

“Are you my guard?” Furuta bares his teeth.

“For now. That was a dirty trick. I lost my student and two little admirers, you know.” Tsukiyama holds up a card.

To Mr. Tsukiyama,

you’re so cute!

Love,

your secret admirers.

Tsukiyama fights back tears. Shio and Rikai and Yusa were no doubt behind that. And now two are gone, along with Naki.

And it hurts.

“Where’s your king? Or should I say kings?” Furuta snickers.

“Resting.” Tsukiyama chuckles. “See, my dear, you miscalculated. Our king fails in many respects, but he loves us. His rampage stopped at stopping CCG. My, my, we had quite a time deciding whether to eat you all or not. In the end, we settled for keeping you all alive.” He displays his kakugans. “Suitable vengeance, isn’t it? Living with yourself.”

“Why?” Fury begins to bubble in Furuta. He isn’t going to waste away here from accelerated aging. He’s going to be executed by a vengeful Kaneki, who will destroy CCG and everyone who partook in this godforsaken war. “Get me Kaneki! Get me him! Let him kill me! I know he wants to – fuck you!”

“Nah.” Tsukiyama nods. “This was definitely the right choice.”

“Kill me!” screams Furuta. “Kill me! Please! Ha, ha – what if I told you I had your Rose’s body in a freezer? Would you kill me then?”

Tsukiyama’s face remains cold. “Karren deserves better than me killing you.”

“No, please!” Furuta shrieks.

“He’s right.” Ui’s voice comes from next door. “We deserve this.”

“I deserve to die!” Furuta bellows.

“Just a question, ever tried deserving to live? Because I think that’s what I deserved.” Hajime calls out from across the hall.

Oh great. The twerp lived. Furuta flops over.

“Someone wants to talk to you.” Tsukiyama opens the door to let in Arima Yusa.

“Lonely?” Furuta asks.

Yusa’s eyes are bloodshot. “You know, you used to be Shio’s hero. What you did for Rize gave him hope long before we knew Arima had a plan.”

Furuta glowers.

“I’m going to forgive you,” Yusa croaks. “Because that’s what Shio would do. And I bet it’s what Kaneki does, too.”

Furuta is terrified. “I’ve become unforgivable.”

“Not to me. Maybe I’m a dumb child, but I have to be, right?” Yusa’s voice cracks, and Furuta stares at him.

“Souta – slap – why did you let her go?”

Souta shrugged. “Because I’m a dumb child. I have to be, right?”

Masanori and 0 squad kids attempt to make a cake for Uihai day :)

“All right, you all. Listen up.” Shio leans forward. “We’re baking a funfetti cake for Uihai day.”

Masanori adores the day between his parent’s birthday. His parents are so sweet to each other and get presents for him, too. “Yesssss.”

“I brought all the colors of the rainbow.” Rikai holds up half a dozen tubes of frosting.

“I brought the mix.” Yusa hols up a box.

Shio pouts. “We should bake from scratch.”

“Shio, we’ll burn the house down and then have to explain to Ui and Hairu why their son is dead,” Yusa replies.

“What does dead mean?” Masanori squints.

Shio giggles. “Eh – ask your parents.”

“Not cool! I thought you were the fun uncle!”

Shio gasps. “My heart! No!”

“Tell him.” Rikai makes her way to the kitchen.

“Dead just means you’re not on earth anymore…you’re in heaven where there’s cake all the time and no one ever gets tired,” Shio says, hugging Masanori.

“Okay.” Satisfied, Masanori races after Rikai. Yusa just shakes his head.

When Ui and Hairu return, their apartment smells like burnt sugar.

“Masanori? Shio?” calls Hairu as she opens the door.

“Surprise!” yell four voices.

Masanori wears a virtual kakuja of rainbow frosting, and the Zero Squad children are equally smeared with icing.

Hairu laughs. “Well, well.”

“We baked you a cake!” squeaks Masanori.

“Well, Yusa insisted on taking it over. That was probably a good idea,” admits Shio.

“Then you, what, had a frosting fight?” Ui asks, hands on his hips. Their entire kitchen looks like a thousand Kanekis were released in it.

“Precisely,” Shio says happily.

Masanori beckons Ui down. He wipes green icing on the tip of Daddy’s nose.

“Now you’re one of us.” Shio nods. “No one can escape the icing.”

“I’ll be a ghoul for a moment, then.” Hairu uses her mouth to eat the icing off Ui’s nose. “See, all better.”

Masanori’s Trick or treating adventure!

“Look at me, Daddy!”

Masanori twirls around, showing off his black bobbed wig. “I’m YOU! Uncle Uta helped me.”

“You look just like Daddy,” Hairu says with a grin. She’s Rapunzel, and Ui is Flynn Rider.

“Yay!” Masanori claps his hands.

Ui is too happy to speak, so he hugs his child instead. “Now, be safe out there.”

“I will!” Masanori hurries outside to join the other GOAT children.

“Trick or treat!” Masanori first rings Touka and Kaneki’s door.

“Yes?” Touka, dressed like a fortune teller, falls back. “It’s a CCG investigator! AHHHHH!”

Masanori giggles. “No, it’s just Masanori!”

Kaneki, having been forced into a purple dragon costume, hands Masanori sugar tubes.

“Thank you!” Masanori skips to Ayato and Hinami’s next.

“Rawr!” Ayato is dressed like a pirate; Hinami, a yellow parrot. They hand Masanori chocolate.

Naki is Frankenstein and Miza his bride.

“Oo-oooooh.” Miza zombie walks towards the children, and they shriek.

“What tasty children!” Pennywise Itori greets them next, with angel Yomo and devil Uta behind her.

“Watch out, I’ll use my quinque,” teases Masanori. “Wait, Uncle Yomo, are those your ukaku wings.”

“With some help from Uta,” Yomo says uncomfortably.

Nishiki is dressed as a spider and Kimi a butterfly, connected by a web, and they hand out homemade cupcakes to thrill the children.

The Quinx mansion is next, and Saiko greets them as Gintoki. Hsaio as a ninja and Shirazu as a shark appear behind her, followed by Aura as perhaps a ghost – a white sheet, as any rate – and Higemaru as some monster of his own devising. Urie and Mutsuki join as Cookie Monster and a cat, respectively.

Cinderella Yoriko and Prince Charming Takeomi hand out more baked goods, and then it’s on to the Tsukiyama’s.

Chie as a bat hangs in a tree, snapping as many pictures as she can.

“Greetings, mortals!” Tsukiyama thrusts open his front door, dressed in rich wizarding robes. Kanae as an elf holds up ring pops.

Arima opens his door, mortified. He’s dressed as a black goat, and sexy witch Eto looks all too pleased with herself.

The children plod over to Hirako’s, where the three Musketeers pretend to attack as a giant Shiba hands them Kit-kats. Hajime appears to chase off the Musketeers, complete as Superman.

Kurona as a vampire and Seidou as a greek god provide Masanori with his favorite gift yet: caramel, the sticky stuff Mommy and Daddy don’t often buy after he smeared it across the entire kitchen.

An enormous version of Maris Stella answers the door at Akira and Amon’s, and the Suzuya Squad as Robin Hood and his merry men – including Hanbee as Maid Marion – swoop in to deliver Skittles.

When Masanori turns around, he sees all the parents gathered. “All right, off to our last stop.”

“Where?” Masanori asks.

“You don’t think your other uncle would miss this, do you?” Hairu asks lightly.

The adults are still wary as they enter the jail. But their reserve soon gives way to laughter when Haise Sasaki greets Kaneki in Furuta’s voice. “Hi, me! We look cute today!”

“I hate you,” Kaneki says.

“I love us,” says Haise. He showers the children with chocolate, and Masanori thinks himself the luckiest kid alive.

Hirako forgives Hajime.

My face is gone.

Hajime Hazuki staggers around the tunnels, feeling a floor slimed with blood, feeling his entrails hanging out of him, feeling but not seeing.

His face is a hole, and it horrifies him.

He hears the Oggai screaming as Kaneki Ken bites them.

My beautiful face…he sees Dad and Mom when he looks at his face. And he was too fucking weak to save his last memento of them. Death would serve him right.

I want to see. He can’t even cry now because his eyes are just a hole.

He collapses on the floor and feels laughter bubble up, though he has no mouth to laugh with.

Then arms grab him, and he’s being whisked off God knows where. Took you long enough, CCG.

He hopes the rest of the Oggai recover, too.

Hajime awakens to feel – his eyes again! He tries to sit, to touch his face, but his limbs are restrained. Huh?

He’s scared, but he forces open his eyes.

“He’s awake.” Arima Yusa stares sullenly at him.

“Hah?” Hajime squints. He’s in some makeshift medical center. Other Oggai are tied to beds, tight enough that their circulation is cut off. A few human investigators are chained less tightly.

“You lost, kid.” Hirako crosses his arms.

“So did your kids,” Hajime sneers.

Yusa squeals. He bursts into tears again, and Hirako too sniffles.

“Pathetic,” Hajime taunts.

“No. What’s pathetic is living only for revenge.” Hirako kneels by Hajime’s bedside. “Hajime Hazuki, I forgive you.”

“I don’t want your pity, weakling!”

“Forgiveness isn’t weak. Shio loved you, you know, and he would forgive you. So would Rikai.” Yusa says through sobs.

“You had parents once,” Hirako says quietly. “The reason I fought was for people like them – killed by ghouls when they deserved more from life. I’m not forsaking their son. They loved you and wanted more for you, and so do I.”

“I killed them! I killed Shio and Rikai!” Hajime screams. “Stop lying!”

“I’m not lying.” Hirako stands. “By the way, if you’re wondering: that’s how Kaneki won against CCG. By fighting for something other than revenge.”

Oh my please i need happy uncle Shio headcanons to distract me from the canon pain™

Don’t we all.

Uncle Shio once brought watercolors to Hairu and Ui’s house. He wanted to introduce Masanori to painting. When Ui and Hairu returned, they found their walls covered in color and Shio with a very guilty expression. Masanori, however, did not look guilty.

Shio taught Masanori all his favorite elaborate flips and spins while fighting.

On the eve of Masanori’s birthday, Uncle Shio once snuck himself, Rikai, and Yusa into the Uihai house to decorate the entire place with glitter, confetti, a piñata, a cake, and more. Ui and Hairu nearly ruined it when they grabbed the quinques, mistaking the three for intruders.

Once, Shio introduced Masanori to his snarky friend Hajime. Hajime dutifully taught Masanori allllll the curse words, which embarrassed innocent Shio. Ui’s hair turned white for a day after that.

Shio has found Masanori scooping ice cream out of a carton not to eat, but to arrange in a swirl that resembles Shio’s hair.

When Masanori was two, he was drop-dead tired and sniffly, as kids do. Shio carried him back home and Masanori whispered “I love you, Uncle Shio,” in his ears. Hairu opened the door, and was puzzled to see Masanori fast asleep and Shio crying.