The straight/bi boys’ reactions to seeing boobs irl for the first time?

Kaneki Ken – “They’re so squishy.” (canon)

Nagachika Hideyoshi – CAN I HOLD THEM

Nishiki Nishio – spills coffee on himself

Koma Enji – eyebrow wiggle

Tsukiyama Shuu – Why can’t boys have something so fabulous

Urie Kuki – I wonder how they’d look on Mutsuki

Shirazu Ginshi – giggles uncontrollably

Higemaru Touma – spends the next day drawing large-breasted monsters

Aura Shinsanpei – crawls into corner

Amon Koutarou – prays

Takizawa Seidou – squeals with glee

Suzuya Juuzou – huh? those look heavy

Hanbee Abara – faints

Miyuki Mikage – I wonder if aliens have boobs

Keijin Nakarai – I’ve just met my future wife

Mizurou Tamaki – closes himself in his room for the rest of the day

Shinohara Yukinori – it was his wedding night with his wife. He was very gentle and she was rather fierce and it was beautiful.

Tatara – *draws Houji with boobs, mails it to him*

Houji – what the fuck Tatara – oh my, these look rather nice

Naki – screams

Yamori – do they hurt if you cut them

Ayato Kirishima – Ayato.exe has stopped working

Yomo Renji – stops breathing

Uta – thinks of them as interesting art/places for tattoos

Arima Kishou – speechless, but a small smile grows on his lips

Nimura Furuta – hello, I’m the bureau director. i like your boobs; can I dominate you?

Kuriowa Takeomi – “Y- Yoriko – you’re – like – beautiful – and – ah – so many feelings!”

Kuriowa Iwao – That’s nice.

Ui Koori – blubbering, red-cheeked mess

Hirako Take – am I supposed to be seeing this?

Washuu Yoshitoki – dazzled

Marude Itsuki – clears throat, smooths hair. Hi there.

Tanakamaru Mougan – Higheerrrrrrrrrrrrr boobs!

Rio – Poke

KuroSuzuya leaving random gifts at Ghoul Seidou’s hideout (anonymously) after finding out where he has been staying, because he knows his old bud is alone and lonely af. Then one day, he leaves a puppy as another gift and letters with terrible sh*t memes. Seidou figures out who the gifts were coming from and gets really annoyed but feels happy to have someone caring for him again, even if it was from that lil punk Juuzou.

Awwwwwwww.

Seidou’s grown accustomed to the gifts left outside his abandoned apartment. At first he feared CCG would show up, that this was a sign of the end, but no one has arrested him.

He doesn’t know if he feels relieved or disappointed.

He is, however, increasingly annoyed with the gifts. Some, like today’s Skittles, he can’t even fucking eat.

He tears open the bag to stomp the candy to bits, but to his surprise, he finds colorfully-coated of Rc cells instead.

Now thoroughly suspicious, Seidou chews on the “candy.” He pretends he’s back with Hoji, with Akira and Amon, maybe with that brat Suzuya…

Seidou spits out the candy.

Suzuya likes candy.

No, it can’t be.

The door rings again, and Seidou yanks it open. No one is around, naturally.

Only Suzuya could do this.

Seidou does, however, shriek at the puppy. Memes of doggos are encased in its collar, and Seidou almost wants to run from the creature.

He’s too evil.

“Get back here, you little shit, Juuzou,” he snaps instead.

Suzuya drops down from his roof. “Did you like the candy? And the pupper?”

“It’s name is Hoji.” Seidou clutches it to his chest. “Why the fuck do you care about me?”

“Because I used to be crazy like you, too.”

“Gee, thanks.” Seidou scowls.

“I want you to tell me how you became a ghoul.” Suzuya pauses. “If Madam had turned me into a ghoul, I would have eaten people, too. I want to know more.”

“Do you really?” Seidou laughs.

“Yes. Besides, I wouldn’t have given you a puppy if I gave up on you.” Suzuya prances into Seidou’s apartment, brandishing his own bag of Skittles.

Could you maybe do seidou and kurona first time? I miss them!

I am loving these first time requests. ❤ Bless you nonny-mice. AND WAHHHH I MISS THEM TOO. </3

“You’re a good man.” Kurona nuzzles the back of Seidou’s neck.

“Am I?” he grumbles.

“Yes.” Kurona smiles at him. She’s not a shy person, but right now she feels it. They’re alone in an abandoned building. They can make it theirs, even if for one night. “Seidou, have you ever had sex?”

Takizawa loves the sound of his first name on her lips. In fact, he’s so focused on that, he almost misses the question. “Wait, what?”

“Would you want to?” Kurona lowers her eyes.

Feral hunger consumes Takizawa. He digs his teeth into her lips. “You don’t find me revolting?”

“I find you magnetic.” Kurona pushes him down onto the floor. “So no, I don’t.”

She yanks off her shirt, and Takizawa squeals at the sight of her chest.

“Turn you on?” she teases.

He nods fervently. His heart hammers.

Kurona chuckles and removes his cloak, his pinstriped turtleneck. Her eyes soften at his scars, and she traces them lovingly with her hands.

Takizawa presses his lips against her unhealed stomach.

Kurona beams at him. He pulls off her pants and promptly fears he might have a heart attack from how perfect her body is. How perfect she is. Yasuhisa Kurona.

When he bares himself before her, he sees admiration and love in her eyes. The kind of love he’d long given up.

She’s reignited those fires. He lets her sink onto him, and their connected. Not just by body, but by Kanou, by consuming families, by half-breeds in an unforgiving world, by love and ferocity and hope and redemption.

Takizawa feels all this and more as they rock together. Kurona feels happy and secure. They lie panting side-by-side, caressing each other with their gazes, when Seidou asks meekly, “Again?”

Kurona smiles. She’s certain Shiro’s holding her thumbs up in heaven.

tokyo ghoul boys as commercials

Kaneki Ken – A trailer for the latest thriller novel from Takatsuki Sen.

Nagachika Hideyoshi – Come to Hawaii, where it’s sunny all the time!

Nishiki Nishio – The latest pharmaceutical. “If you feel like eating human flesh, talk to your doctor. Nishikimiazole may be right for you.”

Koma Enji – An infomercial on how to make the Devil Ape’s Best Coffee.

Tsukiyama Shuu – L’Oreal, because he’s worth it.

Urie Kuki – Advertising firm for career building.

Mutsuki Tooru – Mental health awareness.

Shirazu Ginshi – He and Haru star in a new ad for a research study on for Rc cell over-secretion.

Higemaru Touma – Firefighter appreciation.

Aura Shinsanpei – A trailer for the latest melodrama.

Amon Koutarou – Dunkin’ Donuts

Takizawa Seidou – Antidepressant medication.

Suzuya Juuzou – Skittles commercial.

Hanbee Abara – Social anxiety medication.

Miyuki Mikage – Science museum ad.

Keijin Nakarai – Can you hear me now? Smartphone service.

Mizurou Tamaki – The best beef steak in Tokyo!

Shinohara Yukinori – Be a mentor or child sponsorship.

Tatara – Spy thriller movie.

Naki – Rent your best white suit ever.

Yamori – Creepy ad for an undefined “research study.” Pulled after 1 air.

Ayato Kirishima – Axe Body Spray.

Yomo Renji – Visit Re Cafe!

Uta – Tattoo shop.

Arima Kishou – Glaucoma PSA.

Nimura Furuta – Maybe it’s Maybelline! Or maybe it’s ghoul regeneration!

Kuriowa Takeomi – Lumberjacking, or eyebrow styling.

Kuriowa Iwao – Sports ad.

Ui Koori – NicoDerm.

Hirako Take – Sad, abused animal PSA set to moving music.

Ihei Shio – the best ice cream in Tokyo.

Yusa Arima – martial arts studio.

Mayazumi – eyebrow styling.

Hajime Hazuki – PTSD medication.

Washuu Matsuri – A dating app.

Washuu Yoshitoki – Hiking!

Marude Itsuki – the next gun show.

Tanakamaru Mougan – Hairspray.

Classroom shenanigans with Black Reaper Kaneki as the teacher. Possible students being Touka, Takizawa, Kurona, Amon, Akira, Juuzou, and Quinx kids! (Bonus points for involving Principle Eto!)

“Juuzou, you can’t eat candy in class.” Reaperneki raps on Suuzya’s desk.

Suzuya stares up at him with horror. The lollipop remains in his mouth. “But why?”

“Because it’s disruptive.”

“Not if you do it the right way.” Saiko pops a chocolate square into her mouth. “Just be quick about it, Suzuya.”

“Yonebayashi, do you want to go to the principle’s office?”

She thinks for a moment. “Principle Eto does have a nice couch.”

“Can I go to the principle’s office?” Urie raises his hand. “I’m tired of all your faces.”

Mutsuki frowns.

“Not yours,” Urie assures him.

“Awwwwww,” Shirazu teases.

“All of you: SILENCE!” Reaperneki shouts. “Now, Amon, tell me your initial thoughts on Egg of the Black Goat.”

Amon looks up, guilt plastered over his face like the donut crumbs on his lips.

“Are you fucking kidding me,” growls Reaperneki.

“I got him the donut; it’s my fault.” Akira rolls her eyes. “You know, it’s not the food that makes us inefficient; it’s you.”

Reaperneki seethes. “Aura?”

“I was too busy visiting my sick aunt to do the reading,” he replies sweetly.

Higemaru raises his hand. “I loved it!”

“I found the wording fascinating,” Hsaio adds.

“I couldn’t be bothered to read it.” Ayato yawns.

“Feet off your desk, Kirishima.”

“Which one?” Ayato grins as Hinami gently pushes his feet back to the floor.

“Teacher, you’re kinda weak at teaching literature,” Touka comments.

“You’re weak at literature,” Reaperneki counters.

“You’re weak, period,” she shoots back.

Takizawa passes a note to Kurona.

“Really? At this point, you could just talk,” says Reaperneki.

“Can I talk about how attractive you are, Teach?” whimpers Tsukiyama.

“THAT’S IT! ALL OF YOU! I AM ESCORTING ALL OF YOUR SORRY ASSES TO THE PRINCIPAL’S OFFICE!” Reaperneki roars.

When they arrive, Eto blinks. “You got the entire class here? I’m so impressed.”

Reaperneki growls.

A scenario with Takizawa (Owl) x Kaneki/Sasaki

“I don’t think I really deserve it.” Takizawa looks at the cross in his hands.

“You do,” Kaneki says quietly.

Takizawa swallows. “Was Akira as insufferable to work with as always?”

Kaneki laughs. “She was actually amazing.”

“Oh, she was always that,” Takizawa agrees, climbing besides Kaneki. “In the academy, I felt like I was in her shadow. Got jealous after a while.”

Kaneki laughs. “You, jealous? Never.”

Takizawa experiences a brief moment of panic – is Kaneki making fun of him? But no, the king is smiling at him.

“I’m so tired,” Kaneki confesses.

“Maybe this isn’t my business.” Takizawa plays with the cross. “But maybe you deserve more than you give yourself credit for. You’re so focused on yourself, you’re gonna go insane. I would know.”

Kaneki frowns.

“No, really,” he insists. “You deserve more.”

“Like what?” Kaneki laughs, but he feels empty.

“Like friends. Like becoming the person you should be, not the person the world makes you into.” Takizawa cackles. “I sound like Amon here, don’t I? Christ.”

“Sorry,” Kaneki says to the cross, and Takizawa laughs harder.

“Here, let me show you.” Takizawa leans forward and kisses Kaneki. “You deserve someone better than me to do that to you.”

“Wait, what?” Kaneki grabs his hands. He’s desperate, so desperate for affection. “Do you mean that?”

“Kinda. What of it?” Takizawa shrugs. “I’ve become part of Kaneki’s-crush-cliches. It’s fine.”

“You’re my first kiss.”

“Hot damn.”

“I liked it.” Kaneki squeezes Takizawa’s hand.

(Meant to do Anon) Some fluffy Takirona being cute and awkward telling each other their kinks♡ (I definitely seeing Seidou being into femdom)

NSFW. Ooh la la.

“What do you want?” Yasuhisa Kurona strokes Takizawa Seidou’s hair.

He grins. “Heh heh.”

“I’m serious. We need to be able to have these conversations.” Kurona blushes.

“I … uh … I want you to dominate me.” Takizawa wrings his hands. “I trust you and I like you and I want to see what you can do.”

“Aw,” Kurona purrs. “I’d love to.” Her kagune emerges and strokes between his thighs. “Like this?”

Takizawa gasps. “Like that.”

“And what else?” Kurona uses another tentacle to reach into her purse. She holds the handcuffs aloft. “I’d like to you use these.”

“Make me.” Takizawa has to laugh. “I’m the ghoul. You’ve arrested me.”

“You’ve arrested my heart.” Kurona nibbles on his lips, just hard enough to draw blood. “You taste good.”

“So do you.” Takizawa smirks. She doesn’t think he’s a sadistic bastard? She doesn’t think he’s weird? He loves this woman.

“At some point,” Kurona says with bravado she doesn’t feel, “I expect to see that kakuja emerge.”

“You don’t think it’s ugly?” His eyes widen.

“I love it.” She pushes him down onto their bed. Her kagune pins him down. “How’s this?”

“Perfect, you crazy ghoul.” Seidou leaves love bites along the delicate skin of her neck. She bites back, harder, and he gives himself up.

Masanori’s Trick or treating adventure!

“Look at me, Daddy!”

Masanori twirls around, showing off his black bobbed wig. “I’m YOU! Uncle Uta helped me.”

“You look just like Daddy,” Hairu says with a grin. She’s Rapunzel, and Ui is Flynn Rider.

“Yay!” Masanori claps his hands.

Ui is too happy to speak, so he hugs his child instead. “Now, be safe out there.”

“I will!” Masanori hurries outside to join the other GOAT children.

“Trick or treat!” Masanori first rings Touka and Kaneki’s door.

“Yes?” Touka, dressed like a fortune teller, falls back. “It’s a CCG investigator! AHHHHH!”

Masanori giggles. “No, it’s just Masanori!”

Kaneki, having been forced into a purple dragon costume, hands Masanori sugar tubes.

“Thank you!” Masanori skips to Ayato and Hinami’s next.

“Rawr!” Ayato is dressed like a pirate; Hinami, a yellow parrot. They hand Masanori chocolate.

Naki is Frankenstein and Miza his bride.

“Oo-oooooh.” Miza zombie walks towards the children, and they shriek.

“What tasty children!” Pennywise Itori greets them next, with angel Yomo and devil Uta behind her.

“Watch out, I’ll use my quinque,” teases Masanori. “Wait, Uncle Yomo, are those your ukaku wings.”

“With some help from Uta,” Yomo says uncomfortably.

Nishiki is dressed as a spider and Kimi a butterfly, connected by a web, and they hand out homemade cupcakes to thrill the children.

The Quinx mansion is next, and Saiko greets them as Gintoki. Hsaio as a ninja and Shirazu as a shark appear behind her, followed by Aura as perhaps a ghost – a white sheet, as any rate – and Higemaru as some monster of his own devising. Urie and Mutsuki join as Cookie Monster and a cat, respectively.

Cinderella Yoriko and Prince Charming Takeomi hand out more baked goods, and then it’s on to the Tsukiyama’s.

Chie as a bat hangs in a tree, snapping as many pictures as she can.

“Greetings, mortals!” Tsukiyama thrusts open his front door, dressed in rich wizarding robes. Kanae as an elf holds up ring pops.

Arima opens his door, mortified. He’s dressed as a black goat, and sexy witch Eto looks all too pleased with herself.

The children plod over to Hirako’s, where the three Musketeers pretend to attack as a giant Shiba hands them Kit-kats. Hajime appears to chase off the Musketeers, complete as Superman.

Kurona as a vampire and Seidou as a greek god provide Masanori with his favorite gift yet: caramel, the sticky stuff Mommy and Daddy don’t often buy after he smeared it across the entire kitchen.

An enormous version of Maris Stella answers the door at Akira and Amon’s, and the Suzuya Squad as Robin Hood and his merry men – including Hanbee as Maid Marion – swoop in to deliver Skittles.

When Masanori turns around, he sees all the parents gathered. “All right, off to our last stop.”

“Where?” Masanori asks.

“You don’t think your other uncle would miss this, do you?” Hairu asks lightly.

The adults are still wary as they enter the jail. But their reserve soon gives way to laughter when Haise Sasaki greets Kaneki in Furuta’s voice. “Hi, me! We look cute today!”

“I hate you,” Kaneki says.

“I love us,” says Haise. He showers the children with chocolate, and Masanori thinks himself the luckiest kid alive.

Stumbled upon your blog and your writing is fantastic, please keep them coming! It eases my heart reading your posts and distracts me from the events that happened in latest chapter. :’D And if you’re still taking scenerios, may I request something really angsty between :Re Juuzou and Seidou? Enemy otp/rival/etc as odd as that sounds XD

Aw thank you. We all need a distraction after recent events.

“Thought you were gonna be a top investigator, Seidou!” Suzuya Juuzou yells. He has Jason in his hands, Arata over his body. But to strike – to take the blow that even Akira couldn’t take –

“I thought you were gonna be different for Mr. Shinohara, hmm?” Takizawa Seidou grins. “Move on from your experience, stop killing for orders. Kill for justice if necessary. What happened?”

He feels sick. He, of all people, now knows what Suzuya endured at the hands of ghouls.

But his greatest anguish is himself, who used to be a human, and Kanou, who was a human.

How many ghouls have Suzuya as their greatest anguish?

“You’re a ghoul.” Suzuya raises Jason.

“But I was a human. Do you think I chose this? Did you choose to be in the restaurant?” Takizawa throws back his head and laughs. “You just tried to kill your friend Kaneki, right? Are people that disposable to you? Maybe it’s chance that I was taken by Aogiri and Mr. Shinohara was not. What would you do then?”

Suzuya glowers at him. “Don’t you dare.”

No, no – he can’t picture Mr. Shinohara as a ghoul. That could never happen.

“I will dare. I have to. It’s my life, and I’m not done with it yet.” Seidou bares his teeth.

“Shut up!” Suzuya breaks first, to Seidou’s relief.

“Squad Leader,” gasps Hanbee.

“Shut up, you.” Seidou throws himself towards Suzuya, who prepares to swing Jason –

But Amon Koutarou and Mado Akira leap into the fray. In a matter of seconds, Amon’s kakuja has demolished Suzuya Squad.

“Well. Good work, Seidou. Now let’s cuff them and take them to the merciful ghouls.” Akira snaps her fingers. Seidou’s face lights at her praise.

‘rue island two: seidou makes petty comments at urie for hours’ p l e a s e

soutasnotebook:

Alternative title: The Roast of the Quinx.

“Was this really Maman’s plan?” Saiko tugs at the door. She and her fellow Quinx are trapped in a small room with Akira Mado, Amon Koutarou, and Seidou Takizawa.

“It sucks. Of course it’s Kaneki’s plan,” Urie grumbles.

“I brought you a shirt.” Seidou tosses him a white tee reading This is our get-along shirt.

“Fuck off,” Urie tells him.

“With ladies present? I think not.” Seidou sniffs.

Urie splutters. “You know I didn’t mean it that way.”

Saiko winks at Akira.

“Make your green goblin friend apologize to Akira.” Seidou crosses his arms.

“Seidou, he was only doing what he thought was right,” warns Amon.

Mutsuki’s eyes fill with tears. “I – I don’t think I’ve ever known that.”

“I forgive you, Mucchan.” Akira smiles at him.

“I don’t. I don’t forgive a one of ya’s. Particularly the purple brat.” Seidou scowls.

“Why me?” Urie clenches his fists.

“Because you remind me of me.” Seidou giggles. “I’m your future. Bah!”

He sticks out his tongue. “Have you framed out yet? That’s possible, right?”

Urie’s face now matches his hair.

“Of course he hasn’t,” Aura snaps.

Hsaio coughs. Saiko stares at the floor.

“Urie?” Higemaru gapes at his hero.

“What happened? Did you try to eat your friends?” Seidou cackles. “Omg, to have been a fly on the wall, watching you eat your words.”

“Shut up.”

“In all fairness, he just attacked me with his kagune, not his teeth.” Saiko says lamely.

Mutsuki’s mouth falls open.

“Urie Kuki,” Akira says firmly. “How many people knew?”

“Just us three,” Hsaio says.

“He’s a ghoul! Their First-Class investigator’s a ghoul!” Seidou rolls around on the floor.

Outside the room, Tsukiyama smirks at Kaneki. “I think it’s going well.”

@hamliet @mistystarshine

Of course Tsukiyama was inspired by the grandmother in Mulan. 😉

“You’re a salty bastard, you know that?” Urie spits.

Mutsuki, however, smiles sweetly at Seidou. “I know what it’s like to lose yourself, too.”

“I hear you do.” Seidou holds up his hand for a high five. “Let’s be best friends.”

Mutsuki returns the high five, and Urie scowls.

“Told you we should have used ownership rights over Amon.” Saiko can’t resist throwing a jab at Urie. Amon smiles at her.

“You’re pretty amazing, Yonebayashi.”

“Am I?” She blushes.

“He’s my boyfriend,” Akira says with a wink.

Saiko laughs. “Oooookay. Lucky Miss Mado.”

“You can date Aura if you like tall men,” Seidou calls.

“Ew! She’s like my sister!” screams Aura.

Seidou laughs even more.

“Why are we still here?” whines Higemaru.

“Because Kaneki wants us to sing Kumbaya. And work through our issues so we don’t kill each other.” Seidou shrugs.

“I thought it was a good idea,” Amon says.

“I didn’t, but that didn’t stop me from agreeing.” Seidou grins.

“I hate you.” Urie crosses his arms.

Seidou gasps and sidles up to Urie. “No, you don’t! I will be a good Seidou and a good role model for the new ghoul. I promise. If you haven’t eaten your fellow Quinx yet, you’re already doing better than me.”

He looks sad for a moment, and Urie pities him. If Saiko hadn’t saved him, would he have done the same?

Urie awkwardly rests his hand on Seidou. “There, there?”

“Touch me again and I eat you.”

Urie pokes him.

Seidou pouts, but then they hear a key in the lock.

“Quick!” Seidou waves his hands.

Kaneki opens the door to see the Quinx and Investigators locked arm in arm, swaying and singing Kumbaya.

He hesitates.

“That’s a no.” Tsukiyama shuts the door and relocks it.

“You asshole!” Seidou yelps.