For a gen prompt, can we get a Urie and Kaneki reunion? Let’s see how he reacts to how much he’s grown, emotionally and… ghoulishly.

“You.” Urie screeches to a halt before his former sensei. “What are you doing here?”

“I assume you’re here to kill us.” Kaneki seems sad by the idea, almost like he cares.

“I’m the only one here.” Urie was actually in the forest to search for something dead to quell his hunger, but Kaneki can’t know what he’s become.

“Really?” Kaneki steps closer and sniffs. “Urie.”

“Don’t say it!” Urie scowls.

“You framed out.”

“I said don’t say it!” Urie claps his hands over his ears, just like a child.

“Urie, you know I still love you all.”

“Then why did you go?” Urie looks up, and Kaneki’s shocked to see tears in his eyes. He has matured. “Mutsuki’s barely recognizable, Saiko still cries over you, the new Quinx hate you…we all hate you, actually! You broke our hearts!”

There he is, the Urie Kaneki remembers. “I’m sorry.”

“Sorry?” Urie spits.

“How can we help you?” A blue-haired woman – Urie recognizes her as the manager of Re cafe – slips out from behind a tree.

“I don’t know.” Urie squeezes his eyes shut. When he opens them, the woman is holding out a chunk of meat to him.

He takes it. “Thank you.”

Urie said thank you. Kaneki just wants to hug him.

“I guess you could start by explaining yourself,” Urie says between bites.

Remember when the Qs squad turned into girls? The same. But Urie is there, looking gorgeous

Saiko whistles as Urie enters the pounding nightclub. She’s dressed in an outfit defined more by what’s not there than what is.

“I hate these places,” he grumbles, adjusting his purple gown.

“You look hot,” Shirazu says. He’s clad in a glittery body-con dress, plus a fake chest. He kinda likes it.

Mutsuki mumbles agreement. His face is red, just like the vampirish punk outfit he wears.

Sasaki shakes his head at them. He looks like a child in his lacy getup.

“Next time, we should play strippers,” Saiko says, lounging against the bar.

“I will kill you first,” Urie hisses.

“We should dance to blend in,” Sasaki decides. “Mutsuki, you and Urie get on the floor. Saiko, stay at the bar. Shirazu, with me. We’ll have girly conversations in the restroom.”

“Mutsuki,” Urie whispers as they head – tentatively – onto the dance floor. “My boobs are slipping.”

“I’ll prop them up.” Mutsuki pushes against Urie’s chest.

“Can you not be all over each other?” sniffs a woman.

Mutsuki gasps. He looks like he wants to die.

Urie rolls his eyes. “Come on. Like Shirazu said, at least you got to second base with someone hot.”

Saiko and Shirazu get together and Mutsuki and Urie do too, and Sasaki comes home to the shock of his life.

Bless you.

“Mucchan.” Urie pouts at the base of the stairs. “I just want to kiss you over and over.”

Mutsuki blushes. “You can.”

Urie brushes back Mutsuki’s green locks to see his eyes better. “You wanna go to my room?”

Mutsuki nods, embarrassed but thrilled.

—————————————————-

“Look at them.” Saiko peers around the corner to watch them head upstairs. “I’m so happy for them.”

“I am too. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have earplugs to put in.” Shirazu pushes past.

“Hold on, hold on!” Saiko is offended. “You can’t possibly pass this up.”

“Pass what up?” Shirazu is thoroughly confused.

“These!” Saiko pushes her chest up.

“Oh – oh!” Shirazu looks both terrified and elated. “Saiko. Wait. Do you actually – you feel that way – about me?”

“Of course I do, silly.” Saiko smirks. “If you’d like to touch them, you can.”

“I, uh, I like you.” Shirazu splutters.

Saiko wraps her arms around him. “Shall we go upstairs?”

——————————————————

Sasaki Haise whistles as he enters the Chateau. “Hello?”

He hears a shout from upstairs, and with a smile, heads towards the noise.

“Saiko, you’re amazing,” he hears Shirazu groan. She giggles in response.

Haise is now very confused.

He backs towards Urie’s room. Sane, grumpy Urie.

“Urie, I love you,” Mutsuki’s voice sobs.

“I love you, Tooru,” Urie whispers. “And you have a beautiful body.”

Haise stumbles backwards and nearly throws himself down the stairs. He frantically dials Arima’s number.

“Haise?”

“My squad is – they’re – engaging in activities of a – sensitive nature,” Haise squeaks.

“Hmm. Ui and Hairu should learn from them,” Arima muses.

“No!” Haise hangs up and calls Akira. “Akira! Help! My squad is making love!”

“All together?” Akira sounds scandalized.

“No.” Haise is appalled. “Urie and Mutsuki, and Saiki and Shirazu. I can hear them.”

“Oh. Hmm. About time.” Akira clears her throat. “Want earplugs?”

uihai wherein hairu finds out she is pregnant and ui does not yet know she is part ghoul. bonus if arima is still alive and hairu is worried about telling ui about her pregnancy and if hirako and 0 squad kidlets make an appearance. the ghoul thing should come out somehow… some way… and give ui another existential crisis

I mean Ui is basically one walking existential crisis.

SO much Uihai angst! Much love.

“Hairu is – I mean – um – Hairu is pregnant,” Ui tells Arima, gripping his lover’s hand. “We’re going to keep the baby.”

To his surprise, Arima isn’t angry, but he does exchange a long, firm look with Hairu. “I’m assuming Ui is the father.”

“Yes,” Ui says quickly.

“Congratulations,” Arima says, albeit stiffly.

When they leave his office, Hirako is waiting with a smirk. “Finally, Ui, you learn what it’s like to disappoint your father.”

“It’s as much me as him,” Hairu cuts in.

“Hey, I’m happy for you both. Arima is too. He’s just emotionally constipated.” Hirako shrugs and wanders into Arima’s office.

“Don’t worry.” Ui hugs her. “If worse comes to worse, I’ll distract the gossips and you punch them.”

But that’s not why she’s worried.

Arima texts Hairu an hour later. You need to tell him.

My child needs a father, she replies.

Don’t think so little of him, he types back.

Oh, like you told Hirako and not Koori? Hairu sighs. She ought to be happy right now. She and her beloved Koori are having a baby. She’s always wanted to be a mom. Sorry, Arima.

But when her genetic tests come back in her fourth month, Hairu plans to burn them before Ui sees the Rc count. She crumples the paper on her desk and staggers to the bathroom first.

But before she can, she spins around to see Ui reading them, with all the excitement of a normal father to be.

“Uh.” Hairu freezes.

“They’re Rc-count is wild. Is this a joke?” Ui looks horrified. “What if someone’s been poisoning you? Hairu! How do you feel?”

“Cranky and fat,” she tries to joke.

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

“Isn’t it obvious?” Kijima appears with a gaggle of guards behind him. “Ihei Hairu, you are under arrest under suspicion of harboring a ghoul’s child.”

Ui gasps. “How dare you!”

“You aren’t touching me or my baby!” Hairu knocks Kijima back. She turns to Ui. “It’s yours, I swear.”

“I know.” Ui is perplexed. “Why is the Rc count so off?”

Kijima twists Hairu’s hand behind her back.

“Get away from her!” Ui cries, shoving him.

“It’s off because we are Washuus.” Arima Kishou storms his way in. Hirako, Shio, Yusa, and Rikai are on his left; Haise Sasaki and the Quinx at his right. “We have an abnormally high Rc count.”

His lips curl. “The result of interbreeding humans and ghouls. In test tubes.”

Ui grips the desk to keep from falling. “Hairu, is it true?”

Hairu nods. She slumps over in the Kijima’s arms. He must have special plans for a pregnant ghoul.

“Release her,” orders Arima.

“Do you have the authority, ghoul?” Kijima laughs.

“I’ll say he does,” Sasaki says, and Hirako affirms.

Ui meets Hairu’s eyes and mouths a word.

“Look!” Ui gasps and points behind Kijima.

The inspector whirls around, and Hairu punches him in the back of his head. She leaps into Ui’s arms.

“I don’t care what Hairu is or what our baby is. Get away,” Ui seethes.

“You’re surrounded by hybrids. I’d do as he commands,” Shio adds.

“Well, it’s happening. Congrats, you two are gonna bring down CCG.” Arima shrugs.

Ui cups Hairu’s face in his hands. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

“I was s-scared, Koori. I want you. The baby needs you.”

“And I need you both.” Ui embraces her.

“Hi.” Hirako waves his hand. “Hi, lovebirds. We have a Bureau to overthrow.”

Can you do Arima comforting Haise after a nightmare?

Even during the worst of dreams, Sasaki Haise is silent.

But when Arima Kishou checks in on him, he sees tears streaming down his mentee’s cheeks.

“Hey.” Arima shoves Haise awake. “You okay?”

“Huh?” Haise blinks sleep out of his eyes. “Yes.”

“Wanna talk about it?” Arima sits at the edge of his bed. He’s curious, what life was like for this ghoul. How did the Centipede become the Centipede? What horrors exist on the ghoul side?

“I was in a room, an empty, cavernous room. A mother and a child were brought before me, and I was asked to choose who would die.” Haise resumes his silent tears. “I chose myself – but I was helpless – and they were going to die because I couldn’t choose.”

“That’s noble of you.” Arima has killed children before. This may render him worse than a ghoul. “You’re a good man, Haise.”

“I wish – I wish I knew where these dreams came from.” Haise runs a hand through his hand, and Arima has the sudden urge to confess everything, to unveil the lie.

But the truth would not comfort, and tonight comfort is what Haise needs.

Arima would love to promise that Haise will never have to choose between life again, but he will. He would love to promise to remain at Haise’s side, but he won’t.

So he promises what he can. “I’m here. I promise I won’t let anyone torture you.”

And tonight, as Haise grips his hand in thanks, that is the truth.

Could you do an nsfw Arisasa scenario please?

You’re welcome, Nonny-Mouse! I hope you enjoy.

CHRISTMAS

“You’re the best mentor, you know. Thank you.” Haise Sasaki holds out a Christmas present for his friend.

Arima smiles and accepts the gift. He feels bad he didn’t buy anything for Sasaki.

“You really don’t have to beat yourself up. You’re always doing that.” Sasaki shakes his head. “Can’t you be happy for once?”

“You make me happy,” Arima tells him, and his heart thumps in his chest.

He opens the perfectly wrapped gift to see a framed photograph of 0 Squad. Laughing.

“This is fabulous.”

“I’m glad you like it.” Sasaki sighs. “I had to ask Akira. You’re rather difficult to shop for, you know.”

“So are you,” Arima says lamely.

“Not really.” Sasaki’s face is illuminated by glowing lights, and – and –

From the moment Arima met him in the sewers, Sasaki’s had his heart.

——————————————————————————————

NEW YEARS

Sasaki calls Arima, exhausted after a night helping an intoxicated Akira groom her cat over and over.

“Come over and I’ll brew you coffee,” Arima tells him.

They talk and talk over coffee, and finally Sasaki asks what he’s been wondering.

“Do you like me?”

Arima starts. “Of course.”

“Not like that. At the party last night, Hairu said you were off pining for me.” Sasaki’s face is bright red. “Is that true?”

Arima sighs.

When he looks up, Sasaki kisses him.

A New Year, indeed.

————————————————————————————

VALENTINE’S DAY

“Arima!” Haise rolls over and wakes his boyfriend by peppering his face with kisses.

“Well, that is a pleasant way to awaken,” Arima mumbles. “We could make it more pleasant, though.”

“Oh, really?” Sasaki pulls Arima atop him.

Arima suckles the skin of Sasaki’s chest. He stokes his muscles, and his smile grows with every moan.

When Sasaki is inside him, he feels open and free and beautiful. They’re both part-ghoul, and they understand each other in ways most people don’t.

They collapse next to each other, covered in sweat.

Arima reaches over to their nightstand. “I got you something for Valentine’s Day.”

“Chocolate?” Sasaki laughs at the box. “Well, it just so happens…”

Arima guffaws as Sasaki pulls out the exact same box.

“You’re hard to shop for, you know,” Sasaki says again.

Arima pulls him in for another kiss.