maybe something where hajime steals brooke’s (from peace sign/scapegoat) glasses as a prank and brooke decides to get back at him …with her limited vision

Based on @koyuki-tan‘s “Peace Sign” and its sequel, “ScapeGOAT.”

“Get back here, you little twerp!” Brooke scrambles after a laughing Hajime.

“Come and get me!” Hajime laughs across the cafe. When Brooke hesitates – are those blurs chairs, children, or what? – he continues to mock. “What are you, scared?”

“I am not scared!” Brooke lunges for him, but Hajime scampers outside, where he unleashes his kagune.

“Where – are my glasses in your kagune?!” Brooke squints, but she can’t make out the details. “You little shit.”

“That’s my name. Don’t wear it out,” Hajime teases.

“I’m gonna murder you!” Now Brooke’s kagune emerges.

“Um, maybe don’t?” Higemaru begs, chasing after his wife.

“Make me stop, then!” Hajime chortles.

“Stay out of this!” Brooke shrieks.

Higemaru groans.

Five minutes later, a TSC patrols rushes up. Tsukiyama and Marude step outside, staring at the sight of…not the reported ghoul battle…but Brooke and Hajime, their own Quinx and Oggai, shouting insults at each other.

“LOL I gotta film this.” Tsukiyama yanks out his phone.

“I shoulda done this ages ago, you brat!” Brooke yells.

“What should we do?” The usually decisive Marude is now dumbfounded.

“Nothing, because disaster is about to fall from the heavens.” Tsukiyama gestures towards a heavily pregnant Touka Kirishima, who storms out of her cafe.

“You’re scaring my customers.” Touka growls. Her ukaku begins to grow, and her eyes darken.

Hajime and Brooke immediately vanquish their kagunes, but to Hajime’s distress, Touka still shoots his hand with a small RC bolt.

His glasses drop, and Brooke scrambles to grab them. “Thank you, Touka.”

“You’re no fun,” Hajime complains.

“You know what’s going to be even less fun? This police report,” Marude grumbles.

Can I please request Hajime and Mayazumi babysitting the GOAT children? (From ScapeGOAT) Except that they loose them at some point and have to try and cover it up until they find them again?

Oh my goodness. Based on @koyuki-tan‘s ScapeGOAT, which I highly recommend after reading her first entry, Peace Sign.

“Hajime, help.” Mayazumi’s idea of make-up to tame the children has backfired more than he ever dreamed. He sits on a chair, held down by Tamaki Mizuki, as Ui Masanori jabs his eyes with eyeliner.

Hajime does a double-take before laughing so hard he falls down. “That’s amazing.”

“He’s down,” says Mizuki, an evil light in her eyes.

Hajime scrambles away, but soon the children overwhelm him, too.

“MAKEUP!” screams Higemaru Nagisa, the littlest one, brandishing pink lipstick like a quinque. She and Takeo Shouhei pile atop Hajime, as a vengeful Mayazumi films.

Hajime, though, unlike Mayazumi, continues to struggle. He will not give in. He will not wear makeup – no one can know – everyone should think he’s so tough –

When Hajime has a proper clown face, Mayazumi clicks “post.”

“You did not!” Hajime leaps to his feet, furious.

“I did, traitor!” Mayazumi waves his phone. “That’s for not helping me!”

“You bastard!” Hajime doesn’t care if there are children present! He rushes to the bathroom, determined to clean his face before anything else can happen – but Mayazumi races him, and beats him there. “God dammit!”

At the lack of laughter, Hajime turns his head. The kids usually love his potty mouth, and he loves that they love him.

He feels as though Uncle Yomo has electrocuted him. “Maya! They’re gone!”

“Like hell they are!” Mayazumi hollers from inside.

“I’m not kidding!” Hajime tries not to panic as he searches the entire house. When Mayazumi, taking his sweet time, finally stumbles out, he turns green.

“I don’t know where they are,” Hajime gasps.

The phone rings.

Hajime jolts. “It’s – Koharu.”

No way Koharu can know her Shouhei is missing.

“I have an idea.” Mayazumi grabs Hajime’s arm. “Stay here.”

He switches to video. “Hi, Koharu!”

“Hi Mayazumi. Ryo wanted me to see if the kids are too much for you,” Koharu says.

“Not for me,” says the clean-faced Mayazumi. “For Hajime, though…” he swivels so that Koharu can see his decorated face.

Koharu struggles not to laugh. “I see.”

“I think they’re all tired now,” Mayazumi adds brightly.

“Great. We’ll be home in half an hour.” Koharu ends the call, and Mayazumi slumps over.

“Fuck you,” Hajime says. “And fuck us. Because we need to find these brats!”

The doorbell rings.

Mayazumi and Hajime trip over each other and they rush the door.

Kaneki Touka stands there, surrounded by children. “I think you were missing these minions?”

“Sorry,” says Mizuki, nibbling her lip, as Shouhei and Nagisa hang their heads. Mayazumi, naturally, wears his eat-shit grin. Completely unrepentant.

“They tried to steal Yoriko’s treats and I showed them the power of an SS ghoul,” Touka says.

“We weren’t stealing for ourselves. We have a friend. His name is Ryuu and he lives in an underground garden!” Shouhei says innocently.

“He’s an imaginary friend,” Nagisa adds quickly.

“Then why did he need food?” Touka puts her hands on her hips, and to Hajime and Mayazumi’s amazement, the children are actually cowed.

“Come on.” Touka points them all inside. “Time to have a talk with your parents when they return.”

“But…” Hajime whimpers.

Touka claps a hand on his shoulder. “Don’t worry. The worst they’ll do is eat you.”

erica akita (brookes little sister) dislikes hajime and mayuzumi bc she thinks that they both have cooties.

Based on @koyuki-tan‘s “Peace Sign.”

“Hi Erica, do you want to sit with us?” Mayazumi anxiously waves from the table he’s sharing with Hajime. His hand holds a sandwich that promptly flies apart.

Erica shakes her head. “No, thank you.”

Mayazumi looks crushed.

“Of course she didn’t. She’s a girl,” sneers Hajime, trying to cover up the existential crisis he’s currently experiencing. Erica turning Mayazumi down? Mayazumi’s even more handsome than he is.

“And you’re a boy with cooties,” Erica fires back.

“I’ll give you cooties!” Hajime leaps to his feet, firing forth his kagune.

Erica rolls her eyes. “Now you’re gonna get in trouble.”

Hajime growls. “Shut up.”

“Hajime Hazuki, what are you doing?” calls Aura Shinsanpei, striding across the room.

“Getting in trouble,” Erica answers sweetly. She prances away to leave Mayazumi and Hajime dejected before an aggravated Aura.

I think Yusa needs some love rival competition with Hajime for Marie.

Omg.

Based on @koyuki-tan‘s “Pease Sign.”

“Kitami, teach me how to use my weapons better,” commands Hajime. “And my whole squad. We need to be better.”

His heart quickens. She can see he’s a good leader, right? Furuta just proposed his transformation to an Oggai, so he better learn all he can from the Quinxes. Plus, he can spend more time with Marie.

“Of course!” Kitami Marie draws her fox-like kagune with a grin.

“It’s so fluffy,” marvels one of the kids.

“It’ll kill you,” Hajime shoots back. “But how will it compete with me?” He holds his qunques aloft. “Rah!”

Marie giggles. “Okay, all of you, I want to see those quinques out!”

Yusa passes the training room to see Marie giggling with Hajime as he and the other academy children try to attack her.

Hajime glances up and sees Yusa. He winks.

Yusa’s face reddens. His shoulders slump.

Behind him, Rikai hisses. “You can’t let him get away with this.”

“Let’s go!” Shio thrusts open the doors. “Let’s add Squad Zero to the mix, kids, and see what happens!”

Hajime scowls, but the rest of the kids cheer.

Marie smiles. “That’s a great idea.”

“It was Yusa’s,” says Shio.

“Nice idea, Yusa.” Marie smiles gently, and Yusa clears his throat. Butterflies emerge in his tummy.

Anytime he’s around Marie, he feels happy.

brooke and hajime probably would have a blast throwing snow balls at Ui

Absolutely. Brooke is from @koyuki-tan’s mesmerizing “Peace Sign.”

“Let’s go!” Hajime screeches.

“Huh?” Ui looks up from CCG’s exit. HIs arm is around Hairu’s pregnant waist.

That will afford him no mercy.

“Now!” Brooke commands.

The Oggai leap to their feet and let the snowballs fly.

Ui howls with rage and Hairu howls with laughter. “Protect me, Ui.”

“Help!” Ui tries to yelp, but a snowball strikes his teeth.

Hairu doubles over, overcome by giggles. She slowly gathers more snow into her gloved hands.

Brooke would hate to pelt her with snow, but all’s fair in snow wars.

She’s about to alert Hajime when Hairu slips the snow down the back of Ui’s shirt.

Hajime collapses on the snow, laughing. He creates a snow angel, but Brooke immediately draws devil horns over his head.

“YIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!” Ui screams, whirling on Hairu. “Traitor! In my own squad! What’s next, you’re a ghoul?!”

Hairu bats her eyelashes. “You were too easy.”

“I’m cold,” Ui whimpers.

Hairu tackles him in a hug. “Well, there’s a cure for that.”

oh oh ui and hairu were planning on having a simple New Years party for just the two of them but brooke (my best girl) and the rest of her squad (and maybe the zero squad kiddies because something tells me they’d be all over this) totally crash their party by making it totally wild and fun much to ui’s displeasure.

Also based on @koyuki-tan‘s “Peace Sign.”

“Now this is my idea of a party,” says Ui, pouring two glasses of wine for Hairu and he. “Just us.”

“Hmmm, and what else can we do before New Years,” Hairu murmurs, a seductive grin on her lips.

Ui leans towards her. Her fingers unbutton his shirt.

“Surprise, elected hosts!” Their door crashes open. Ui gasps, and Hairu sloshes her wine onto her blouse.

“Oh my.” Brooke blinks at the sight of Ui desperately trying to mop Hairu’s blouse. “Kids, don’t look. This isn’t a sight for innocent eyes.”

“He’s just trying to clean her shirt,” Shio says in confusion.

“Let’s agree to that,” Brooke says quickly.

“It’s okay, Ui, it was an old shirt anyways.” Hairu smiles. She wasn’t planning on wearing it for long anyways, even it’s not exactly off for the reason she expected.

“We heard you weren’t coming to any parties, so we decided to bring the party to you,” Rikai says shyly, holding out an offering of cake.

“Apology accepted,” Hairu says, sniffing the pan.

“Ui, your fly is open,” Brooke says.

“What!” Ui gasps, but of course, it’s not true.

He glowers at her as the Zero Squad kids howl with laughter.

Their doorbell rings.

“Who else did you invite?” Ui asks with dread. Koharu’s on a date. Carma is moping, Marie is helping her, and Michiko is with Mizurou. That leaves…

“Surprise!” Brooke whips open the door as a dozen kids pour in.

“What a nice apartment!” shouts Hajime.

“Can you believe we get to stay up til midnight?” Mayazumi yells back.

“How do the Oggai have better manners than you?!” Ui fires at Brooke. He will have to inform Koharu about this. Definitely. New Year’s is canceled.

But when he turns around, Hairu is already cranking up the stereo, and Hajime’s asking her to dance…and even Ui Koori has to admit, they’re pretty cute.

wouldn’t it be funny if hajime made fun of yusa’s crush on marie but marie would still defend yusa even if she still didn’t truly understand his feelings for her?

Omg he totally would.

Characters from @koyuki-tan‘s “Peace Sign.”

“Aw, is someone hiding behind a girl…or are you really hiding?” Hajime wiggles his eyebrows at Yusa, who cowers behind Kitami Marie. He just caught Yusa rushing alongside the beautiful Quinx, and this is too good an opportunity to pass up. Besides, he wants to impress Marie himself.

“Shut – shut up,” stammers Yusa.

“Hey, Hajime, knock it off.” Marie puts her hands on her hips. “You don’t have to be mean to Yusa.”

“Aw, I’m just trying to play evil matchmaker,” Hajime says, twirling a pretend mustache.

“What?!” cries Yusa, horrified. His secret is out!

Marie, however, merely laughs. “Hajime, you’re a terrible matchmaker.”

“Hey.” Hajime pouts.

“Now run back along to your Oggai friends, and be nice to Yusa. He’s a sweet, smart boy, and we’re all blessed to know him,” Marie declares.

Yusa’s face is now as red as the iris in Hajime’s kakugan.

“Uh-huhhhhhhh.” Hajime winks at Yusa before skipping away. He immediately whips out his phone.

Yusa’s buzzes, and he winces as Marie smiles at him. “Don’t let Hajime get to you. He’s probably just jealous that you’re in Squad Zero, Yusa.”

“Okay,” Yusa rasps. She walks away, and with relief Yusa yanks out his phone.

I hope you realize what a favor I just handed you, doofus – Killer H.

Yusa scowls. It’s not a favor unless I wanted it.

But before he presses send, he recalls the warm, tingling feeling of Marie praising him. Maybe, just maybe, this was worth it after all.

All of Kaneki’s implied and canon admirers talk about how much they love Kaneki, what they want to do with Kaneki if they got into a relationship with him and what they love about him, what made them fall in love with him: so this includes Roma, Mutsuki, Hajime, Hinami, Touka, Rize, Tsukiyama, Hide, Saiko, Eto, etc (side comment: Boy Neki has himself a hell of a lot of admirers!)

Like how does Ken get and maintain these admirers I’m jealous.

“I’ll go first.” Touka sighs. She can’t believe Urie and Marude’s solution was a group therapy session for all of Kaneki’s admirers.

“Now that he’s recovering in the hospital, you can all work out your problems,” Marude said. What a dumbass.

“I first fell in love when he told me he’d care if I died, even though I was a murderer,” Touka says, a sad smile on her face. “I just want to raise our kid together and give them…the childhood we never had.”

“I fell in love with his scent,” says Tsukiyama. “And convinced myself I wanted to eat him instead of love him. Now I just want him to stay alive.”

“Tsukiyama is a bad example for ghouls,” Hinami says quickly. “I love how Onii-chan taught me to read. That’s why I want happiness for him.”

“He was tasty,” Rize says dreamily, still somewhat dead inside after being held captive for years. “I’d still like to eat him.”

“I like Maman because he always loved us when we were brats,” Saiko says, crossing her arms. “Now I just want to hug him and tell him he’s okay every day.”

“I find him fascinating.” Eto grins. “So much potential. I’d torment him day and night.”

“Potential tragedy. People who try to be good because they hate themselves are my weakness.” Roma giggles. “I love sitting back and watching.”

“This is why you don’t have friends, old maid,” Eto shoots back.

“I like him because he’s what I want to be, only I’ll be better because I won’t betray CCG,” Hajime declares.

Hide shakes his head. “Kid.“

“What?!” Hajime huffs.

“Never mind.” Hide sighs. “You know, I’m not sure. I think I always have, but I haven’t recognized it until it was nearly too late. Now I just want him to be happy.”

“What about you?” Hide turns to Mutsuki, who swallows hard.

“Uh…ummm…I like that he showed me kindness when I was a gross murderer,” Mutsuki whispers.

Saiko coughs. “That’s, uh, close to Touka’s.”

“I know.” Mutsuki stares at the floor.

Touka slides closer to Mutsuki. “Ken’s a great guy.”

Mutsuki smiles, tentatively, at her.

Maybe, Touka thinks, Marude wasn’t such a doofus after all.

((Thank you so much for all that you do. When is your birthday, btw?)) In the same DBZ crossover universe, Hajime Hazuki is trying to find his place in the world after being defeated and detained when Kaneki and Gohan introduce him to Chie, Goten and Trunks, gaining two friends he would grow close to and an intense budding love for a certain half saiyan girl.

I’m happy to. ❤ My birthday is is July! When is yours? 😀

And yasssss Hajime.

“How’s it going, Hajime?” Kaneki peers through the cracked door. He’s hesitant to enter.

The immediate response is “GO AWAY!”

And then, “Why do you keep visiting me in this cell?”

“Cell?” Gohan is confused. This kid is troubled, he knows, but he’s in a nice home, with nice surrogate parents – Amon and Mado seem perfect to him.

“I’m not allowed to go outside on my own,” the kid says mockingly. He yanks open his door and reveals his kakugan. “Heya, mutt.”

“Hajime, can you not?” Kaneki pleads.

Chie peers closer. “Ooh, I love that kakugan. Can I see your kagune?”

Hajime flushes. He didn’t realize a girl was here. “Sure!”

He thrusts out his crimson tentacles. “Like Kaneki’s, but better.”

Gotten coughs. Trunks shakes his head, but he rather admires this brat.

“We are going to take you out for ice cream,” Kaneki says awkwardly. “If you wanted.”

“Please say yes.” Chie clasps her hands, and Hajime looks terrified.

So that’s his secret weakness. Girls. Gohan grins.

“Fine.” Hajime sniffs and makes sure to sidle up to Chie. “Did you know I was the leader of a Squad once?”

“You were a child soldier?” Goten is horrified.

“I liked it!” Hajime stomps his foot.

“Well, I like you not in danger,” Kaneki replies.

Hajime scowls.

“I like you alive, too,” Chie says.

Hajime immediately brightens. He makes a mental note to order the same flavor of ice cream as she so they’ll have more to talk about.

Shio introduces Masanori to memes.

“Masanori!” Ihei Shio waves his nephew over.

“Is today the day?” The kid quivers with excitement.

“It is,” Rikai intones.

“Masanori, today you begin your training.” Yusa hands a phone to Shio.

“Gaze upon it,” sings Shio, holding the pink-coated device out to Masanori.

Masanori frantically types into the phone. Finally he holds up a image.

“Not bad, not bad,” Shio says merrily. “But watch this!”

“This is Uncle Fruit,” Yusa adds.

Some time later, Uncle Hajime strolls in alongside Ui and Hairu.

“LOOK I MADE YOU INTO A MEME!”

Masanori races over to shove his meme in Hajime’s face.

Hajime subconsciously pats his cute face. “At least I’m cuter than that thing.”

“Shio, you didn’t.” Ui is not prepared for this day.

Hairu is ready.

“Hairu, no!” Ui cries. She winks in response.

Masanori grins. “I made us into a meme, too!”

Ui is almost too terrified to look, but when he does, he’s surprised at the tears that prick his eyes.