The Qs get a tabby cat called Mochi. She is good therapy for everyone.

All cats are, friend, all cats are.

– Mutsuki is mildly afraid of Mochi, but eventually Urie helps him see Mochi as an opportunity to move past his past.

– Mucchy’s bed is Mochi’s favorite place to snuggle at night.

– Saiko is the Lord of the Can Opener, and Mochi purrs the moment he sees her.

– Hsaio loves playing with Mochi. She will run all around the house with string for Mochi to chase.

– Higemaru is building an elaborate cat tree for Mochi. He’s also the source of Mochi’s catnip addiction.

– Aura is scared of Mochi, too, which of course makes him Mochi’s favorite lap.

– Aura soon fishes to treat Mochi.

– Urie loves Mochi, but Mochi loves using him as a scratching post. It’s a sight to see – Urie dancing and leaping around, yelping in pain, as Mochi attacks his feet. He only does this to Urie.

Okay but 14 y/o Hsiao and Matsuri at whatever age at the time just scheduling a meeting with Tsuneyoshi wearing matching t-shirts saying “I’m gay” on them

Oh my god yes.

“Are you ready?” Matsuri’s hands sweat. He smiles at his cousin, who’s supposedly less valuable than him, but he likes sneaking away to play with the garden kids like her.

Hsaio nods before kicking open the door to Tsuneyoshi’s office.

“What on earth -”

“Move aside, idiots.” Matsuri shoves Arima out of the way.

Hsaio and Matsuri yank off their sweatshirts to reveal rainbow T-Shirts reading I’M GAY across the front.

Tsuneyoshi glowers at his grandchildren. “Is this a joke?”

“Nope,” Hsaio tells him.

“We gay,” Matsuri squeaks. “I want to marry a boy.”

“I want to kiss Big Sis Hairu,” Hsaio says dreamily.

Tsuneyoshi grabs his phone. “Yoshitoki? Get your ass in here.”

The room is awkwardly silent as everyone waits.. Arima remains expressionless.

“Oh.” Yoshitoki stops short in the doorway, the moment he sees their shirts. “Is that all?”

“Your spawn will destroy our legacy,” Tsuneyoshi growls. “We’ll get you a new wife and -”

Yoshitoki gasps. “No. I’m not putting another woman through that.”

“Oh, is that how it is? Are you like your son, then?” Tsuneyoshi mocks. There’s a dangerous edge to his voice.

Arima stays silent, knowing perfectly well what his brother and Special Investigator Marude do behind closed doors.

Yoshitoki sighs. Matsuri looks terrified, and Hsaio clutches his arm, determine to kill them all if they try to hurt her friend.

And his father would.

Yoshitoki sighs. His choice is obvious. “Yes.”

“What?”

“I put the B in LGBT.”

“I’m sorry?”

“I’m a man, I’m a tough man, and I’m bisexual, Father.” Yoshitoki looks at Matsuri, who sweats with fear.

“You – ”

“I’m in love with the half-ghoul leader of Aogiri,” Arima throws in quickly.

“What?!” Tsuneyoshi gasps. “What is wrong with my family?”

“I mean…inbreeding, rape, sex trafficking, toxic masculinity…” Hsaio rattles off the words that come to her mind.

“From now on, what if…we oppose V? What if we stop our abuse?” Arima suggests quietly.

“Yes!” cheers Matsuri.

Yoshitoki grabs his son’s hand. “For you, Matsuri, I would do anything.”

“What?! Get back here!” Tsuneyoshi fumes as his family walks away.

“We’ll be in trouble soon,” Arima says. “I’ll call my girl and get everyone whisked away to safety. A lot of secrets are about to come out.”

Yoshitoki smiles at Matsuri and Hsaio. Pride ripples through his heart. “Thanks to these two.”

Hsiao is a babe and needs more love

– Saiko’s gonna give it to her. 😉

– Aura is never going to be forgiven for kicking her in the boobs.

– Hsaio is probably going to wind up the runner-up mother-figure of the Quinx members (Kaneki holds the top position, of course).

– Hsaio is going to convince Ui to build Big Sis Hairu, Arima, Shio, and Rikai an ostentatious memorial. Of Saiko’s design.

– Hsaio is gonna look after sick Saiko. She will not leave Saiko’s side, though she’ll cry at the horn growing from her.

Hsaiko fluff!

ALWAYS. ❤

– It’s canon that Hsaio likes cleaning Saiko’s ears, but she also kinda likes cleaning any acne Saiko, and styling Saiko’s hair.

– Saiko, in turn, likes giving Hsaio back rubs.

– They’ve definitely gone bra shopping together on more than one occasion.

– Saiko once saved up money for a special date…to a Jacuzzi spa. When they were finished, the two Quinxes felt more relaxed than they had in ages.

– Saiko must sleep with mountains of pillows and seas of blankets. Hsaio must sleep with neither, so Saiko has all the blankets to herself.

– All Hsaio needs to be comfortable at night is to snuggle besides Saiko.

– Hsaio once saw Saiko looking up wedding dresses on her laptop and has been quietly exulting ever since.

– When Saiko talks about her family – and she doesn’t much – Hsaio holds her, and seethes with rage. She’s no stranger to horrid families herself, but she aches for Saiko.

– Once Hsaio spotted Saiko’s mother on the street. She gave her a furious look before realizing she wasn’t worth the effort.

– Unbeknownst to both women, Higemaru and Aura have been low-key planning their wedding for months.

Hc of mutsuki & urie refusing to talk so they try to get each others attention by making the other jealous. x)

– Mutsuki starts it, because he’s insecure about Urie interrupting him to focus on the mission, per 161. He was trying to be good and take responsibility for Aura, dammit!

– He flirts a bit with Aura, then. Mutsaura time!

– Aura is just confused and Saiko amused. She immediately sees where this is going.

– Urie then tries to make Urisai a thing. Slips his arm around Saiko.

– She is not having it and tosses Urie backwards into Mucchy.

– Hsaio catches on and elbows Higemaru and a very scared Aura into action. They push Mutsuki into Urie.

– “Now talk, dumbasses,” Saiko orders, before leaving with the Quinx.

– It’s only then that reality dawns on Aura. “WAIT. THEY LIKE EACH OTHER?!”

– Hsaio and Higemaru clap hands over his mouth as Saiko drags him out, leaving a very embarrassed Urie and Mucchan.

Hakatori gets to know the Qs. Higetori.

“Hi.” Hakatori waves at the Quinx, who are gathered in the living room to the Chateau. Plus Kaneki Ken and Touka Kirishima. “Well, I know you two already.”

“But you don’t know meeeeeee.” Saiko rolls over to her. “Hi, I’m Saiko, and I have an awesome rinkaku.” In less than five seconds, she has molded her kagune into a skeleton.

“That’s amazing.” Hakatori gasps.

“I’m Hsaio.” A dark-haired girl smiles tentatively at her.

“The half-human.” Hakatori nods.

“I’m Aura.” A figure half-waves from the corner.

“He’s a grumps,” Higemaru whispers. She giggles.

“What’d you say?” Aura demands.

“Nothing untrue,” Hakatori replies with a gleam in her eyes.

“We’ve kinda met.” Mutsuki waves from the couch, where he snuggles against Urie.

“Well, I got to take on at least one Quinx bikaku now.” Hakatori grins at Higemaru. “But I’m always up for another.”

Mutsuki snorts. “I can mold mine too.”

“Wait, really? Teach me!” She looks thrilled. “Wait, teach both me and Hige.”

Higemaru grins. “We’ll be the bikaku terrors.”

“I’m already terrified,” Urie mutters as Higemaru pecks Hakatori on the lips in front of them all.

“Let’s spar together!” Higemaru wraps his arms around Hakatori. “Please?”

“If only to get you two off each other,” Touka teases.

“I can handle it.” Mutsuki waves his hand. “Saiko, help me teach them the art of kagune manipulation.”

At the end of the day, Hakatori has pinned Urie to the floor, Touka has Aura on his knees, Hsaio, Higemaru, and Mutsuki are at a standstill, and Kaneki has given up against Saiko, because she made her kagune into Haise Sasaki and he can’t stop laughing.

“Your family is wonderful,” Hakatori says, leaning over to whisper in Higemaru’s ear.

Higemaru buys Hakatori some bottles for her collection and flowers for her to sketch and the Qs tease him about his crush.

“Higemaru, what are you doing?” Saiko peers into the kitchen.

“Nothing,” he says quickly, as he continues scrubbing the glass bottles he dug up from the dumpster. He will ensure they’re sparkling by the time he gives them away.

“It’s clearly something,” Aura says dryly.

“Flowers, too.” Hsaio whistles at the a bouquet of tropical, imported, expensive flowers in a vase. “Who’s the lucky lady?”

“Shut up!” Higemaru blushes as pink as his hair.

“I know,” Mutsuki pipes up behind the rest of them. “I think it’s a good thing!”

“You do?” Higemaru grins.

“Me, too.” Urie folds his arms. “I think Hakatori will love it.”

“Urie!” Mutsuki’s mouth drops. He can’t believe Urie told them.

“What?”

Higemaru squeaks. His arms flap around, scattering soap suds across the floor.

“Is she coming over here for a RC dinner? When?” Saiko demands.

Higemaru moans. He scrubs the bottles harder.

“Here.” Mutsuki hurries closer. “We’ll help you.”

Higemaru brightens. “Really?”

“Yeah. It figures, with two of us framed out and one of us a half-human, someone would fall for a ghoul at some point,” says Aura. “Didn’t expect you, but hey.” He hands him a thumbs up. “You got this.”

“When does she come over?” Hsaio asks.

“She doesn’t,” Higemaru says with surprise. “I’m, uh, just leaving these on her doorstep.”

The room falls silent.

“Saiko, I’ll leave this to you,” says Urie.

The next morning, the rest of the Quinx hide in bushes as Higemaru knocks on Hakatori’s door.

“What?”

“I bought you flowers to draw. And bottles! Hi!” Higemaru thrusts the gifts at her.

“Huh?” The goth girl blinks at the pink wunderkind. She’s sparred with him a few times – they both have bikakus – but she had no idea. “Hi.”

“Do you want to get dinner sometime, Hakatori? Or do you prefer Yumitsu?”

“Hakatori is fine,” she says slyly. “And sure.”

Higemaru claps his hands together. “Thank you!”

Saiko’s vine account is called boobsweat or pikapikabitch

It’s called boobsweat of pikapikabitch.

She also hands out advice for boob attacks to calm guys down, the best ways to avoid work, recovering from abusive parenting, and, recently, how to save your distraught friends and family.

Occasionally, she uses her kagune to show elaborate sculptures, too. Those ones aren’t as popular peoples humans are squicky about kagunes, but Saiko’s proud of herself for combating Quinx stigma…and now ghoul stigma.

She also reviews push-up bras, which Touka and Hsaio have taken advantage of more than once.

Except when Touka told Kaneki she got the idea from Saiko, that kinda killed his sex drive for the night.

Touka, Uta, Oneshot!Kaneki, Hsiao and ghoul!Seidou kinks headcanons?

Touka – Sex in abandoned buildings or at inopportune times pleases her. She also loves being on top and slightly dominating.

Uta – Definitely into roleplaying. The weirder the better. He molds his kagune into a variety of tools, as well. Sometimes he and his partner wear masks.

Oneshot!Kaneki – A fan of sex in the shower. And possibly oral sex.

Hsaio – sex outdoors. Away from people, but outdoors, under the stars.

ghoul!Seidou – he probably likes blood to be involved. Enjoys doggy-style. ~~May or may not ramble about his parents when he orgasms which is a bit of a buzzkill for his partner .~~

Crack head cannon: After kaneki is extracted from dragon, q squad encounters the women they saw aura and mutsuki try to kill earlier now at the hospital and witness her punch a doctor ( that nobody liked cause he was more interested in dissecting kaneki then saving him). Saiko suggests they should go talk to her cause she might know her maman, which they do and it’s leads to a whole bunch of revelations.

“There they are.” Saiko and the rest of the Quinx have finally arrived at the hospital. Tokyo’s controlled enough that they can visit Maman for an hour.

She waves at Hide, Tsukiyama Shuu, and the manager of :Re. They all wave back, though their attention remains on the white-haired doctor talking to them.

“Perhaps he might better serve the world in a lab,” says the creaky old doctor, pushing his glasses up his nose.

“Oh, hell no!” The pretty ukaku the Quinx saw from earlier leaps to her feet and punches him square in the jaw. “Not on my watch, you’re not.”

“Amen.” Hide claps.

“Miss -”

“We saw nothing,” Tsukiyama says innocently.

The doctor scowls before scurrying away.

“I’ll call Dad and find a proper doctor.” Tsukiyama leaps to his feet and hurries off in search of better phone service.

“Do you know Saiko’s Maman?” Hsaio asks.

Mutsuki turns red. He and Aura exchange glances.

“I’m his wife,” says the ghoul with a shrug.

“Wait – what?” Urie sputters.

“Seriously?” Higemaru grins.

“AIEEEEEEEE!” Saiko launches herself into the ghoul’s arms. “Hi! Hello! I’m Saiko! I’m your daughter, kind of, I guess!”

The ghoul laughs nervously. “I’m Touka.”

“We should talk,” Mutsuki says nervously.

Touka nods. “That sounds good to me. It’s nice to meet Ken’s family.”