Crack request: Uta/Renji/Arima/Tsukiyama all fighting over Take

CANON.

“Arima! You’re alive!” Hirako Take gasps as V dissipates, leaving the dead garden children crawling out of the earth. It would be creepy, but Take can see the recognition in Hairu and Arima’s eyes.

“Wait, wait, wait. No.” Tsukiyama jumps between Take and Arima. “Boy is mine. We bonded over Hajime Hazuki.”

“You stole my sister, now I’m stealing your boyfriend,” Yomo shoots back, uncharacteristically angry for Yomo. He grabs Take’s hand.

“Cheating after I saved your life? Renji, Renji, don’t you know Take Hirako has been mine from the start?” No-Face saunters forward.

“Wait.” Arima speaks slowly. “I came back from the dead for Take.”

“I forgave you for Take,” Yomo replies.

Tsukiyama stomps his foot. “I helped him in Goat!”

“So did Renji,” Uta replies with a shimmy. “And Take and I are destined to battle to the death.”

“I thought that was me?” Yomo crosses his arms.

“Take chooses to raise my newly resurrected garden children with however many of you are willing,” says Hirako. 

“Wait, you let them die?” Arima looks horrified.

Nozomi meeting her grandparents (Houji/Tatara) for the first time~? <3

Nozomi is the devious Arieto child from @hamliet‘s “The (Mis)Adventures of Goat.”

– She takes to Tatara immediately, because Eto’s told her all kinds of mischief tales with Tatara.

– Houji is still processing that Arima is married to Eto, they had sex, and now they have a child who by all appearances would be CCG’s worst nightmare, if CCG still existed.

– “Is it true you’re a stick-in-the-mud?” Nozomi taunts Houji. “Uncle Seidou said so.”

– Houji gets on her good side by supplying the voracious Nozomi with food. He and Tatara often give her airplane rides, or contort themselves into jungle gyms. She likes jumping from uncle to uncle.

– At the end of the day, Houji corners Arima. “Admit it. You like your little clown.”

– “No, I love them both,” Arima says, with a hint of emotion. Which is more than Houji’s ever seen, and that’s enough to satisfy Tatara. 

What is your personal opinion about Arima and Suzuya?

Personally, I love them. 

Suzuya is one of my favorites. He’s an incredibly disturbed kid, was tortured and abused and made into a weapon, then given a second chance by an adult who showed him love and he actually responded to it. T-T

I think, now, his dependence on “what Mr. Shinohara would want” has become an crutch for ignoring his own feelings and ideas. The manga depicts him as very distressed over Furuta’s actions, yet he still tried to kill Kaneki and exhibited cruelty towards Hinami and Touka. I hope he reckons further with his past and moves ever onwards.

Arima is a fascinating character. His suicide hurts my soul. The poetic lines on how he always hated himself, who only lived to take from others, are heartbreaking. And yet…his plan required allowing countless ghouls to suffer and die, and female ghouls to be raped over and over by Tsuneyoshi. And then, what was Arima’s actual plan – for everyone to turn into ghouls? For Kaneki to be the strong leader he wanted Kaneki to be, but Kaneki was not? 

Idk, what I’m trying to say is Arima is shrouded in mystery still. I think there’s a lot more to discover about him. 

And while Furuta’s plan involved more outward genocide and bloodshed, Arima’s plan still relied on allowed ghoul’s unfair deaths and rape to continue. So was Arima’s plan better than Furuta’s, in actuality? Eh…I think it was, because Arima ultimately did want peace, while Furuta primarily wants to die. I understand why Arima did what he did, and why Furuta did what he did, and I mourn the actions of both (and I suspect Arima did too). 

All that to say, Arima is a fucking amazing, well-developed, beautiful character. If he ever crossed into the Snk world, he, Erwin Smith, and Eren Kruger would have a lot to talk about. ❤

Okay but 14 y/o Hsiao and Matsuri at whatever age at the time just scheduling a meeting with Tsuneyoshi wearing matching t-shirts saying “I’m gay” on them

Oh my god yes.

“Are you ready?” Matsuri’s hands sweat. He smiles at his cousin, who’s supposedly less valuable than him, but he likes sneaking away to play with the garden kids like her.

Hsaio nods before kicking open the door to Tsuneyoshi’s office.

“What on earth -”

“Move aside, idiots.” Matsuri shoves Arima out of the way.

Hsaio and Matsuri yank off their sweatshirts to reveal rainbow T-Shirts reading I’M GAY across the front.

Tsuneyoshi glowers at his grandchildren. “Is this a joke?”

“Nope,” Hsaio tells him.

“We gay,” Matsuri squeaks. “I want to marry a boy.”

“I want to kiss Big Sis Hairu,” Hsaio says dreamily.

Tsuneyoshi grabs his phone. “Yoshitoki? Get your ass in here.”

The room is awkwardly silent as everyone waits.. Arima remains expressionless.

“Oh.” Yoshitoki stops short in the doorway, the moment he sees their shirts. “Is that all?” 

“Your spawn will destroy our legacy,” Tsuneyoshi growls. “We’ll get you a new wife and -”

Yoshitoki gasps. “No. I’m not putting another woman through that.”

“Oh, is that how it is? Are you like your son, then?” Tsuneyoshi mocks. There’s a dangerous edge to his voice.

Arima stays silent, knowing perfectly well what his brother and Special Investigator Marude do behind closed doors.

Yoshitoki sighs. Matsuri looks terrified, and Hsaio clutches his arm, determine to kill them all if they try to hurt her friend.

And his father would.

Yoshitoki sighs. His choice is obvious. “Yes.”

“What?”

“I put the B in LGBT.” 

“I’m sorry?”

“I’m a man, I’m a tough man, and I’m bisexual, Father.” Yoshitoki looks at Matsuri, who sweats with fear. 

“You – ”

“I’m in love with the half-ghoul leader of Aogiri,” Arima throws in quickly. 

“What?!” Tsuneyoshi gasps. “What is wrong with my family?”

“I mean…inbreeding, rape, sex trafficking, toxic masculinity…” Hsaio rattles off the words that come to her mind. 

“From now on, what if…we oppose V? What if we stop our abuse?” Arima suggests quietly.

“Yes!” cheers Matsuri.

Yoshitoki grabs his son’s hand. “For you, Matsuri, I would do anything.”

“What?! Get back here!” Tsuneyoshi fumes as his family walks away.

“We’ll be in trouble soon,” Arima says. “I’ll call my girl and get everyone whisked away to safety. A lot of secrets are about to come out.”

Yoshitoki smiles at Matsuri and Hsaio. Pride ripples through his heart. “Thanks to these two.” 

Ui is afraid of spiders!

“Oh my god, get it away from me!” Ui bursts out, skittering behind Hairu. 

“Huh?” She looks up in puzzlement. “Oh!”

Hairu laughs at the spider gracefully descending from the ceiling. “I think it’s lovely.”

UI shakes his head. “One of you brave ghoul investigators, kill it.” 

“Nah,” says Hirako, leaning back in his chair. “Spiders don’t bother me.” 

“Are you crazy?” Ui hisses.

“I’m a child and you’re the adult,” Shio protests.

“I like it,” says Yusa.

“Ui, save us,” says Rikai.

Hairu rolls her eyes. “How about I capture it and take it outside?”

It’s weird, she thinks, as she coaxes the creature onto a paper towel. She’s showing more mercy to an arachnid than a ghoul.

She waves the captive spider before Ui, who blanches.

“Can we keep him?” Yusa asks.

“NO.” Ui shivers.

Would he shiver at me? Hairu wonders.

She turns to leave, onto to run into Arima. “Say hello to our spy, Arima!”

Arima scrambles back. “Get – it – away!”

Hirako chortles. “We’ve found Arima Kishou’s secret kryptonite!” 

An American ghoul called Bella Hennesey. She has an Ukaku/Bikaku Chimera. Please write about her :)

This sounds like a fascinating chimera. 😀 

Bella Hennesey. Like the liquor, but spelled differently.

That’s how she’d introduced herself to Hirako Take. Tall, with a cute glasses and an upturned nose framed by glossy auburn hair in a perfect bun, she’d asked him for reports on current investigations for her PhD research. Shown her University of Tokyo ID and everything. Dismissed her awkwardness with her American mannerisms. 

And now Squad Zero has cornered her for being something more than interested in ghouls. For being a ghoul.

A green ukaku, like shards of the Emerald City in The Wizard of Oz, emerges from her shoulders. A long, snake-like bikaku creeps out from her lower back.

The Wizard of Oz. The movie they’d watched. Hirako was going to ask her for a second date, too, before Ui had discovered her secret.

“Really?” she mocks. “That’s all the manpower you brought? I’m insulted.”

“And women power!” Hairu yells.

She ignores Hairu. She even ignores Hirako. Arima, Bella knows, is the true threat. 

Without a second glance towards Hirako, Bella falls off their roof. Arima leaps forward, but she has already flown away. 

They search but don’t find her, and Hirako has to admit he’s relieved. Even if she joins Aogiri after how he treated her.

“I just…can’t believe she was a horrible person,” Hirako admits later, when he and Arima are alone in Arima’s office. “I’m so weak, huh?”

“No, I don’t think so.” Arima’s eyes glimmer, and for a moment, Hirako wonders if Arima let her go for him. 

But that’s stupid. Arima would never.

Arima clears his throat. “I know that ghouls can be good people. There’s a secret…I need you to know.”

And that is how Bella Hennesey changed Hirako Take’s life, though not in the way either anticipated. 

crack head cannon (which isn’t really crack this time): Arima is Kaneki’s uncle or godfather (his older brother/friend is a sunlit garden defect like rise but only Arima knew what happened to him i.e. settling down and having a kid). Because of his relation, he was given an opportunity to adopt kaneki when his mom died. However, he declined because he didn’t want the washuu to find out whose son he is. Its a decision he always regretted.

“What is this?” Kaneki looks at the dusty shoebox in Hirako’s hands. It’s 3 am, and Hirako has suddenly shown up in his room to greet him with “there’s no emergency, so don’t get up.” 

“Something he always wanted to show you.” Hirako still can’t bring himself to say his name. “It concerns your father.”

Kaneki stills. “Who?”

Hirako hands it to him without another word.

Kaneki’s palms ooze sweat as he slides off the lid.  

The first object is a photo. A young Arima, smiling and easy to recognize, with someone who looks just like Kaneki, except for his blue hair.

Blue, the same color as Arima’s. 

Their arms wrap around each other. They smile with an ease Kaneki’s never witnessed in Arima. And now he never will.

“His name was really Arima, too. He was another garden kid,” Hirako said. 

“That can’t be.” Kaneki stills. “Furuta said I was no one.”

“You were to Furuta. Not to Rize. She smelled the Washuu on you. And, Kaneki, did you really never wonder how you managed to survive a procedure so may failed?” Hirako holds up a paper. 

A birth certificate. Arima Haise. “This was your father’s true name.”

Kaneki blinks back tears. “No.”

And yet he digs into the box. Some are photos. Some notes, back and forth between the father he never knew and this father figure who was apparently so much more. All meticulously dated. 

And, finally, Kaneki finds the date he’s looking for. 

Mom had died. It was from the state. 

Asking Arima to adopt him.

In Arima’s chicken scratch handwriting, there’s three words printed. I’m sorry, Ken.

Kaneki looks at Hirako. Tears run down his cheeks. “Why?”

“To protect you.” Hirako shrugged. “That backfired.”

“I don’t believe that,” Kaneki bursts out. Ire flashes in his belly. Arima could have – could have prevented all of this!

Hirako swallows. “If I had to guess, he was too ashamed of what he was – too ashamed that he had never seized the freedom your father had – too afraid of failing to agree.”

Kaneki chokes back a sob. “He could have saved me. He could have – we could have spent so much longer together. I could have learned so much more.”

“Truth hurts,” Hirako agrees, placing a hand on Kaneki’s shoulder. He lets the kid sob. 

Somewhere, he imagines Arima is sobbing, too.

….Yoshimura as Obi-Wan and Kaneki as Luke? I neeeeeeeeeeeeeed more star wars crossovers

“I must be one or the other!” Kaneki Luke cries. 

“No. Only a Sith deals in absolutes. You may be both human, and ghoul,” says Obi-Wan Yoshimura. 

—————————————–

“Strike me down, and I shall become more powerful than you can possibly imagine,” Obi-Wan Yoshimura says to the reaper of death, Darth Arima. All around him, CCG forces gather. He can’t walk away from this. He will die in front of Anteiku…and Kaneki. 

Arima’s IXA pierces Yoshimura’s kagune.

“NOOOOOOOOOO!” screams Kaneki, lunging forward into the hands of CCG.

——————————————-

“Did Yoshimura tell you about the One-Eyed King?” demands Darth Arima.

Kaneki clutches the cell door. His eyes are put out. He can’t see, and all they call him is 240. Why does this death god seek him out? “He told me you killed him!”

“No, I am the One-Eyed King.” Arima holds out his hand. “Join me, and we can better the world of humans and ghouls!”

Kaneki shakes his head. He can’t believe himself good enough. And so he falls, falls, falls…into his cell at Cochlea.

—————————————-

“So, you have a friend waiting for you at a cafe. Perhaps I shall target her next.” Darth Arima mocks.

“NO!” Kaneki unfurls his kagune. He and Arima fight madly as Bureau Emperor Tsuneyoshi cackles in the distance.

Finally Kaneki pierces Arima’s armor. Arima falls. His eyes stare up at Kaneki – or one does. His other is blank, as if he cannot see, as if he really is One-Eyed. 

Kaneki hesitates. He won’t be like Arima.

“Good, good, let the hate flow through you. Kill him, my new apprentice!” Tsuneyoshi approaches.

Kaneki straightens. Compassion floods his veins. “No. I will oppose you with everything I have.”

“Well then.” Tsuneyoshi begins to transform into an enormous kakuja. He throws Kaneki to the ground. 

Against his will, Kaneki screams. Tsuneyoshi is tearing him apart inside – “Arima! One-Eyed King! Help me!”

Arima lunges to his feet, throws himself before Tsuneyoshi. His father’s kakuja digs into his chest. 

Suddenly, Tsuneyoshi collapses as a sword pierces his heart. 

“I’m sorry,” says Furuta, cheerfully sticking another sword in his father, “did I miss something?”

——————————————

Kaneki drags Arima out of CCG. “I won’t let you die. I will save you!”

“You…already have, my One-Eyed King.” Arima smiles at Kaneki as the light fades from his eyes. 

Crack head cannon: cochela doesn’t give prisoners haircuts, so when sasaki was released his hair was quite long and at first glance he could easily pass as a woman. During the tour around the ccg squad zero kids don’t help and further solidify to passerby’s that the new squad member is a girl much to Haises annoyance. Next day he comes in with a haircut. Everyone was left to believe the lady quit after her first day and tease Arima for years. Until Arima tells the story at Haises x mas party.

lollololololololllllllllllllllll

“Okay, okay, you think Hajime’s a brat, but do you know what the Squad Zero kids did?” demands Ui. His arm is almost, but not quite, around Hairu’s shoulders. Propriety. Yeah, that’s it.

“Do tell,” says Akira, clutching her seventh glass of wine.

“Please don’t,” says Sasaki.

“Arima, tell it.” Saiko winks. She’s heard Arima is a legendary storyteller, too. 

Arima winces. “Well…”

“Come on, out with it.” Hairu giggles. Rikai, Yusa, and Shio bury their heads in their hands.

“So.” Arima sits down. “One long day, our Squad was gifted with a new investigator. Their hair was white and flowed to their shoulders. Shiny as a shampoo commercial.”

Sasaki’s face is now crimson.

“And then, our darling prodigies decided to introduce everyone to ‘the new woman in our squad.’”

“I was excited to have someone think we had three females,” Rikai insists.

“Was I not enough?” Hairu counters.

“Take me,” says Saiko.

“This new woman vanished the next day, and coincidentally, we replaced them wth Sasaki Haise.” Arima sips his tea. “Or so the Bureau Legend goes.”

Urie rolls his eyes. A grin spreads over Shirazu’s face.

“You mean that story isn’t true?” Mutsuki asks.

“Ask the lady.” Arima points to Sasaki. “Amazing what the power of a haircut can do.”

“You!” Akira doubles over laughing. 

“You kids were such a handful!” Ui shakes his head at the three junior investigators. 

“Don’t ruin our urban legend,” Shio begs. “Keep it quiet.”

“We are powerful masters of myth,” Yusa intones.

“Madam Sasaki, may I have this dance?” Shirazu sticks out his hand. 

“Sure.” Sasaki grabs Shirazu and spins him in a circle as everyone laughs.