Hajime, in addition to his canon fanboying of Kaneki’s strength and implied unhealthy attachment, has a crush on him, and the reason he’s mad Kaneki didn’t take him with him when Kaneki and Touka were getting married is because he wants to be at Kaneki’s side even if he can’t have him

 This is one of the funniest asks I’ve gotten. I adore this! 

Hajime crouches besides Kaneki’s limbless body. “Why didn’t you invite me to your wedding?”

Kaneki snaps back to reality. In his mind, all his past selves are flabbergasted. “Huh?”

“I wanted to marry you. It’s not fair; you could’ve at least invited me!” Hajime crosses his arms.

Furuta halts his walk away. Oooookay, this wasn’t the plan.

Furuta and Kaneki’s eyes meet each other, and for once, both of them share the same emotion: bewilderment.

“Hajime, are you feeling okay?” Furuta asks delicately.

“Isn’t my face beautiful, too?” Hajime cries, stroking his cheeks. “You were – you were supposed to be the ghoul who helped people – I wanted to be a part of that – but you’re just weak – and you don’t even care about me!” 

He kicks Kaneki. “Take that! And that!”

“Hajime…I’m sorry,” Kaneki lies.

Furuta doubles over with laughter. “You’re a horrible liar, baby.”

Hajime summons his kagune and shoves it in Kaneki’s mouth. “Now you can’t lie.”

Kaneki bites down, and Hajime gasps. “He’s eating me!”

He feels kinda honored.

“Finally,” mutters Furuta.

But instead of a rampage, instead of flying body parts, Hajime keeps regenerating his kagune and feeding more to Kaneki.

Furuta waits. “I order none of you to attack him. Let’s see how far this goes.”

Kaneki throws back his head and laughs. His centipede kakuja is now complete. 

“You calculated well, Furuta, I’ll give you that. But you weren’t counting on the power of love, were you?” 

“We’re gonna troll you together,” Hajime says, rubbings hands together with anticipation.